When robbers make multiple robbery attempts, they are often called brazen, but when the robber in question is a older woman with a penchant for hoodies making her look like a Sith Lord, how should we describe her? Brazen seems almost too masculine. Perhaps she has gumption or spunk. Or maybe she's just a dirtbag criminal. Whatever the case, this lady is back. Her wardrobe may have changed slightly, but her choice of location to commit her crimes has not.
According to the FBI, older Sith Lord lady robbed the Woodforest National Bank inside Walmart on Northpark Drive in Kingwood on Tuesday. This is the second time she has hit this exact same bank. Maybe she is brazen after all.
On Tuesday, she entered the bank at around 4:32 p.m. dressed in her signature hoodie -- this time, a jaunty black and white ensemble -- and boldly (according to the FBI anyway) said, "I'm back!" She asked for cash, got an undisclosed amount which she crammed into her oversized black purse -- probably purchased with the loot from her last robbery -- and strolled out the front door.
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Honestly, if this woman weren't a criminal lowlife type, I might actually find her mildly awesome.
She is described as a white female between 40 and 45 years old. She is between 5'4" and 5'6" tall and weighs around 130 pounds with dirty blonde hair -- not sure if they mean it has specs of brown or it just hasn't been washed in a while.
Her hoodie of choice this time around was black and white with an Aztec print on it. She also wore white gloves, which is a terrible faux pas considering it isn't yet spring. She did not brandish a weapon and no one was hurt, which begs the question: Why bother giving her anything? Couldn't they just conk her over the head or something?
Crime Stoppers is offering up to $5,000 for information about this spry lady bank robber. If you have information, please call 713-222-TIPS (8477) or the FBI at 713-693-5000. And if you know where to pick up a sweet Aztec black and white hoodie, you can contact me directly.