We round out the week with the logical final chapter of what has been the daily saga of ousted Arkansas football coach Bobby Petrino -- his house is up for sale.
Now, before getting overly dramatic about the home's placement in the MLS listings and thinking that this is something Becky Petrino did in a fit of rage upon the discovery of her husband's 25-year-old girlfriend/coworker, know that the home has been on the market since May 6, 2010, over two football seasons and God-knows-how-many-mistresses ago.
With college- or near college-aged kids, apparently the Petrinos had been in a mode where they were looking to downsize from the nearly 9,000-square foot, six-bedroom mansion. Now, they're probably still looking to downsize, but for entirely different reasons.
The asking price on the three-acre compound is currently set at $2.5 million, but frankly, with millions of dollars in future earnings flushed down all nine of the toilets in this castle, you'd probably be catching Bobby at a time of financial weakness. In other words, "or best offer" may apply here.
Weichert Realtor Brandon Long (not sure if he's any relation to Arkansas AD and Petrino guillotine operator Jeff Long) couldn't confirm the house is Petrino's, but property records show the address listed as that of the former Razorbacks coach. Frankly, you don't need to be a forensics detective to figure out the home belongs to Petrino, you merely need an Internet connection and five free minutes to watch the home's virtual tour slideshow. The master closet full of Razorback red golf shirts and stacks of baseball caps is a fairly decent giveaway that the place is indeed Casa de Petrino.
(By the way, if you didn't click on the virtual tour link, you really need to; the soft background music begs for a Jim Nantz narration in that soft "reading the Masters leader board" voice. "...and friends, there is the home theater where Bobby watched and rewound all of his press conferences to confirm how awesome he is..." Also, the endless string of bedrooms feels like a not-so-subtle reminder of what got Petrino into all of this trouble in the first place.)
The epilogue to Petrino's firing could be written over the weekend as the school has placed the former coach's mistress Jessica Dorrell on paid leave, presumably as the administration and her attorneys negotiate some sort of
hush money parting gift.
Where else can you cheat on your fiancé and wind up with a cash settlement to leave your job that you attained because you were banging the boss?
Only in America.
Listen to Sean Pendergast on 1560 The Game from 6 a.m. to 11 a.m. weekdays, and watch the simulcast on Comcast 129 from 6 a.m. to 7:30 a.m. Also, follow him on Twitter at http://twitter.com/SeanCablinasian.
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