Hard to believe now, but there was a time not too long ago when Texan fans openly debated the appropriate amount for the Texans to allocate this past offseason to re-sign defensive end/outside linebacker/chronic underachiever Mario Williams. Sure, the Texans defense was just fine without Mario for the final eleven games of 2011 (Actually, they were finer than practically every other team's defense in the league), but imagine the level they could take it to if they brought Mario back, said conventional wisdom.
That's how the argument in favor of locking Mario up went. Thankfully, those Texan fans even entertaining that idea lost the argument, and $96 million later ($50 million guaranteed), Mario Williams was signed, sealed, and delivered to Buffalo, hailed as the savior for a Bills defense that allowed the most points in the AFC in 2011.
Well, so far, it's gone less than swimmingly for "Super" Mario. (Because of the Super Mario Brothers video game, regardless of how shitty you are at your job, your nickname is "Super" Mario. Mario Williams is proof of this.)
It started with a 48-28 loss to the Jets opening weekend (a Jets team that's gone on to score 33 points in its other three games combined) and, sandwiched around a couple wins against wretched Kansas City and winless Cleveland, there was Sunday's 52-28 loss to the New England Patriots.
Sunday was especially painful for Bills' fans because to them Sunday's game is the reason that they collectively greenlighted the signing of Mario as the "right move." The path back to glory runs through Foxborough, at least that's how Bills Fan feels. Here's your money, Mario, now go beat the Pats! Sack Tom Brady!
However, the Bills are quickly finding out what Texan fans (the right-thinking ones, at least, that were ready to give Mario a ride to the airport to get him the fuck out of here) have been shouting from the rooftops for some time -- Mario is a null set who does most of his sack-compiling in huge bunches against bad teams.
Through four games this season as a Bill, Mario has accumulated a paltry 7 tackles, 1.5 sacks, and 1 pass defended. In contrast, the actual best defensive player in football (as opposed to the guy who's merely paid like it), J.J. Watt, has stacked up 20 tackles, 7.5 sacks, 5 passes defended, 2 fumble recoveries and a level of adulation from Texan fans that Mario would have needed a telescope to locate during his time here.
In short, Mario Williams is (still) what he is -- a largely uninspiring, very rich, physical specimen, who by signing with Buffalo has rendered himself irrelevant on the NFL landscape for the rest of his prime playing years.
But don't take it from me, take it from Bills fans!
The nice thing about 2012 is that I don't need to be a mouthpiece for a fan base or make baseless assumptions about what they might be thinking. We have social media to allow the voices of the voiceless to be heard.
Along those lines, Twitter was not kind to Mario Williams (@bbwolf94, if you need him) on Sunday. Now, he may or may not have noticed, seeing as he hasn't tweeted in over two months, but the point of this exercise is to gauge the temperature of a mystified fan base and admittedly take pleasure in Mario being their problem and not our problem.
So let's go to the Twitter footage, shall we?
It actually started off all right for Mario on Sunday, with a handful of Bills fans trying to get him pumped up before the game. Let's keep in mind that despite their $100 million free agent's virtual no-show, this was still a team ready to move to 3-1 on the season if they beat New England.
The Bills hate Tom Brady and Mario was going to be the problem solver:
@bbwolf94 You gotta bring today. Be fearless and keep that motor going. This is why we brought you to buffalo to sack Brady!!!! #BiilsMafia
— Phil Bifulco(@phillybifulco30) September 30, 2012
@buffalobills are gonna get this W today. And @bbwolf94 is going to cripple Tom Brady
— brett combs (@FV13TeamTatted) September 30, 2012
Hell, even Mario Williams brother was getting some love!
Tailgating with @bbwolf94's brother #Winning
— Jason LaJoie (@LaJoie24) September 30, 2012
However, it quickly went downhill during and after the game. It started with subtle reminders that the game had started (in case Mario didn't know):
@bbwolf94 hey man it's week 4... Just making sure you didn't forget the season started.
— Jeff Kaluzny (@kalooz24) October 1, 2012
Then his mom got dragged into it:
@bbwolf94 Your mom got more sack in my bedroom last night than you have in 4 games. No wonder the Texans let you walk..100 million EPIC fail
— Kevin(@TheOccultTruth) September 30, 2012
And then it was on...
@bbwolf94 was the $100M invisible man again today.
— Robert DeGaine (@CPTBobby) September 30, 2012
You will die a rich BUM @bbwolf94. Who cares about your Lambos, Rarries, and mansions. #dissapointment #moneyisnteverything #provemewrong
— Just Joe (@BLOSports4Life) September 30, 2012
@bbwolf94 You won the 100 million $$ lottery... now you are never gonna work again you lazy piece of shi%
— Matt Albert (@mattalbert23) September 30, 2012
@bbwolf94 what the hell man??? Love ya but what the fuck already. Rip someone's head off!!!
— Our QB Blows!!! (@JohnC8) September 30, 2012
@bbwolf94 just threw your jersey in the garbage #bills
— Michael Smith (@Smitty650) September 30, 2012
@bbwolf94 you should delete your twitter you loser, you suck. Were you man handled again or illegal hands to the face every play?
— Carl Howard (@CHN1623) September 30, 2012
I wish I could be @bbwolf94 show up get 1mm a game and not gave to do my job
— Chris Heinle (@MrHeinz716) September 30, 2012
@bbwolf94wow u are really stinky. #stealingcandyfromababy
— JOE (@Jfalse33) September 30, 2012
Glad this @bbwolf94 signing is working out for us.... #Bills
— Rich Sady (@RichSady) September 30, 2012
Damn @bbwolf94 you came to help us...Earn your salary, Brady is Slow, but against you seem like Usain Bolt
— Garcia Hotspur (@adelgado82) September 30, 2012
Here come the @bbwolf94 excuses . . . #thereisonlyonebrucesmith
— Eric Crawley (@ericcrawley) September 30, 2012
Give some of that cash back @bbwolf94u r terrible at best
— Robert Castiglia (@robcastiglia01) September 30, 2012
Here's some advice. Use that 100 mill to fly far away from buffalo as possible you fucking nobody.Super Mario my ass. #cunt @bbwolf94
— Anthony G. Atallah (@Antwon69ish) September 30, 2012
In four weeks I have heard @bbwolf94 's name 5 times.
— angry black bird (@angryblackbird) September 30, 2012
Hey @bbwolf94 could you please make it look like you're trying even tho we know you're not
— Dan M (@DanM311) September 30, 2012
In short, I think this one about sums up Mario's season so far....
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@bbwolf94 Good job, good effort
— Andrew Simmons (@ASimmz) September 30, 2012
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