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Can the Houston Texans Get Garcia In This Rosenfels Trade? Jeff Can Come, Too

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NFL free agency starts today. And since the Houston Texans are trading Sage Rosenfels to the Minnesota Vikings, they find themselves in desperate need of a backup quarterback. And with Matt Schaub as the number one QB, the Texans are going to desperately need a proven backup for those games when Schaub is injured.

There are several semi-prominent quarterbacks who will be available on the free agent market, and some of them might actually consider giving the Texans a shot.

Kerry Collins came off the bench to lead the Tennessee Titans to the playoffs after the injury to Vince Young. Collins was the QB for the New York Giants team that lost to the Baltimore Ravens in the Super Bowl, and he has also guided the Carolina Panthers to the playoffs. Collins, however, is only as good as his surrounding cast, and as demonstrated in his time with Oakland, if that cast isn't good - especially the running game - then he's not any good.

Rex Grossman is also available. Grossman, or the Sex Cannon as he is known by some, led the Chicago Bears to the Super Bowl several years ago. Then again, I doubt that any guy known as the Sex Cannon is what Bob McNair has in mind for his team. Also, if a guy can't beat out Kyle Orton, he's probably not a good choice.

The Chron's John McClain thinks the Texans will settle on someone like Dan Orlovsky or Ryan Fitzpatrick. Orlovsky started seven games for the 0-16 Detroit Lions last season while tossing six touchdowns against six interceptions. He also has a little trouble staying inbounds when he's in the end zone. And except for a big game against the Texans several years ago, Fitzpatrick, the backup to Carson Palmer at Cincinnati last season really doesn't have much to offer.

I think the Texans should do everything possible to sign Jeff Garcia. First, there's the fact that Garcia is a tough bastard who's known for taking a beating while keeping on ticking, something for which Schaub's not exactly known. He's also worked under alleged offensive geniuses Steve Mariucci, Andy Reid, and Jon Gruden, so he shouldn't have any problem working under alleged genius Gary Kubiak.

Garcia has also shown that, with a little protection, he can lead any team to victory, and since he was a starting QB at one time or another for the Cleveland Browns, Detroit Lions, Philadelphia Eagles, and Tampa Bay Buccaneers, he's shown that he can do wonders with teams with so-so running games and mediocre receivers, so just think what he could do with the Texans, a team with a promising running back and one of the best receivers in the NFL.

Yes, I'm aware that Garcia wants to be the starting quarterback, but surely he realizes that he'll backing up Matt Schaub. And that means he'll start at least half of the season's games.

But forget all of that. The real reason I want the Texans to sign Jeff Garcia is so that we can watch Mrs. Jeff Garcia in the stands. If I'm going to be stuck with watching a mediocre football team again, I would like something to look at, and Carmella Decesare, now known as Carmella Garcia, is a former Playmate of the Year and Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Model.

Come on, Texans, do the right thing and sign Jeff Garcia. He's a proven winner at QB, something this team has never had, and his wife's not only a proven winner, she's gorgeous.

Then again, this is the Texans, and we're talking about Gary Kubiak. Patrick Ramsey, who held a clipboard for the Denver Broncos last season, is a free agent, and we all know how Kubiak is when there's a Bronco out there just waiting to be picked up. And former Tampa Bay Buccaneer savior Chris Simms is also available, and he shares a tattoo with Texans offensive coordinator Kyle Shanahan. So he's also probably a prime candidate.

But damn, wouldn't be nice to be able to spy on Mrs. Garcia in the Reliant Stadium stands next season?

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