Last night in San Antonio, the Spurs systematically dismembered the Oklahoma City Thunder by 35 points, 112-77.
What had been a close game through one and a half quarters began to spin out of control for the Thunder just before halftime, leading to a second half that essentially amounted to a 24-minute submission hold. In the end, Kevin Durant, Russell Westbrook, head coach Scott Brooks, they were all figuratively lying in a pool of their own blood with the Spurs theme music playing, like the end of an episode of Monday Night RAW.
The Thunder are playing without their best defensive player in Serge Ibaka, who also doubles as the only Thunder player with a pulse offensively not named Durant or Westbrook, so this series is a cat-and-mouse game of Spurs head coach Gregg Popovich deciding which Thunder scab to pick and Brooks trying futilely to stop the bleeding.
If you're Oklahoma City or a fan of close games, this series is a mess. So thank God we have Charles Barkley!
The only compelling matchup left in the Western Conference Finals is between TNT's mouth extraordinaire, Sir Charles, and the women of San Antonio, whose ample-booty-ness Barkley has referred to many times, but for some reason, this postseason the whole thing has escalated into a conflict that, by the end of the weekend, may be the only reason left to watch this series.
The 2014 feud started a couple of weeks ago with this Barkley rant...
A River Walk "dirty creek" blast to boot!
It escalated with Barkley's non-apology, which was apparently a big enough deal to where entertainment outlets were reporting it like actual news (a true sign of a great feud)...
Then came Barkley getting confronted by some shitty radio host from San Antonio in an attempt to bait him into some type of viral moment...
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Finally, last night came the latest step in Barkley vs Portly Females of the River Walk as Barkley spent what was supposed to be an entire interview with Spurs small forward Danny Green cutting a WWE-style promo on a slew of Spurs fans telling him he sucked...
I am thoroughly enjoying the ride Barkley has put us on, and can't wait for the whole thing to eventually be settled on pay per view in some sort of mud-wrestling handicap match like what Dewey Oxberger did in Stripes.