Connor Barwin Is Looking to Give Playoff Tickets to His Most Zealous Stalker

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Playing NFL football is not an easy job, and this by no means has been an easy season for Texans outside linebacker Connor Barwin. Coming off his best season as a pro in 2011 with 11.5 sacks and unable to come to terms on a long-term extension with the Texans during the preseason, the fourth year player out of Cincinnati has chased his near Pro Bowl season in 2011 with a statistical dud in 2012 (three sacks, five passes defended), although Gary Kubiak and Wade Phillips will tell you that, to a man, everybody in the organization has been perfectly content with Barwin's play this season. (The truth in those statements will come in the offseason when it comes time to do -- or not do -- a deal with Barwin.)

Also, adding to Barwin's shaky 2012, it's widely assumed that he (along with nose tackle Shaun Cody) was the brains behind the heavily ridiculed letterman jackets the Texans wore on their trip to New England.

Still, despite all of that, Barwin remains a wildly popular player with many fans in Houston, largely because of how warmly he's embraced the city, its culture and its social scene.

Connor Barwin also likes to tweet (@ConnorBarwin98, if you need him), and according to many, he's pretty good at it. In fact, he received the award for Best Athlete on Twitter at the Houston Web Awards this past year. (Let me say right now that If I could win an award for tweeting, it would only be surpassed by winning an award for eating pizza rolls and Googling pictures of Kate Upton, the other two things that I'm really good at.)

So this past weekend, with the Texans on the eve of their first playoff game of the 2012 postseason, Barwin's popularity and his Twitter prowess met in the middle for one of the more uncomfortable ticket giveaways that you will see.

Around 5:30 p.m. on Friday, Barwin tweeted to his followers that he would be giving away two tickets to Saturday's game with the Bengals at Reliant Stadium. Pretty cool, and something that I'd seen a handful of players that I follow doing on Friday. Via the magic of embedded tweets, let's go back and relive the contest as it unfolded on Twitter...

So, we all went back to our lives for a few hours and waited for 9:00 to roll around. At that point, we would find out how Santa Connor was going to dole out his gifts.

Well, along came 9:00...

I've been paying attention, Connor! How do I win???

Oh, you're gonna make us work for it, eh? I feel ya, dawg. All right, well, I can answer six questions. I am an NTN trivia junkie and very good at standardized testing! Let's do this! What's the first question?

Okay, well, that one's easy. I remember the article this year about Connor Barwin's gay brother and the picture of his family. That answer is three. I'm winning so far, next question...

Yikes, that one's a little harder. I know you're a big "underground band" guy, Connor, but I may need to Google that one....continue....

Your favorite pizza? Um, wow, there's like 5,000 pizza places in the city of Houston. This one may be tough to guess. Also, I'm not going to lie, I'd feel a little weird if I knew where you like to eat pizza, Connor. Okay, let me come back to that one. Uh, next question....

Favorite sports blog? Is this something that you bring up often, Connor, or do I need to somehow hack your computer and look at your cookies folder? This contest is getting difficult. And frankly, a little weird....um....next question? I guess?

Oh damn, I remember the story that you searched out the entire city to find the guy because he had painted the side of some warehouse in the Third Ward or something like that, but I don't know his name...um, next question (as I begin to search ticketcity.com because I'm slowly realizing I haven't been stalking Connor Barwin nearly close enough to win this contest)....

Man, finally, a Google-able question again...thank you, Urban Dictionary! Slow, low and bangin'!!

Okay, so I know the number of brothers you have, Connor. And I looked up SLAB. Let me quickly guess the other four questions -- you wrote a review for the Psychedelic Furs concert, you like frozen pizza from the supermarket, your favorite sports blog is David Barron's TV and radio blog in the Chronicle, and your mural was actually a collection of foods that you hired hacky comedian Gallagher to splatter on your wall.


So where do I pick up the tickets???

Ah, I see. I din't win. Danny Berg actually knows that shit about you. Okay, well, this contest should make it much easier for HPD to find the guy that's been waiting outside the players' parking lot for you after practice every day, and these tweets I would guess will hold up as evidence in court. So that's good news.

Some not so good news? It appears that the winner of your contest might not be rooting for you in the next round of the playoffs...

Listen to Sean Pendergast on 1560 The Game from 6 a.m. to 11 a.m. weekdays, and watch the simulcast on Comcast 129 from 6 a.m. to 8 a.m. Also, follow him on Twitter at http://twitter.com/SeanCablinasian.

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