Dog Abuse Bad. Cow Abuse Awesome.

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I’ve called out you PETA types in the past. Not so much because I condone the mistreatment of animals, but because I have questioned your priorities in demanding harsher punishments for the likes of Michael Vick than for Ray Lewis and Leonard Little.

Well, I’m calling you out again.

The Houston Livestock Show and Rodeo starts today. And for the next three weeks we’re going to be subject to a bunch of carpetbaggers demanding that we act like real Texans – never mind that the majority of this cattle wrangling stuff went on in parts of Texas other than Houston. And never mind that I am actually a native Houstonian and think that most people who wear cowboy boots and hats in the suburbs are just as stupid as most of those suburbanites who commute to downtown Houston in their gas guzzling pickup trucks every day (and then bitch about how much gas costs).

But here’s what amazes me. Every year about this time, we’re subjected to three weeks of animal cruelty and no one seems to care. There’s never any protesting down at Reliant Stadium. No one tries to bust up some of the barbaric crap that’s going on inside the arena. And do you know what, I have this feeling that some of you, who feel dog fighting and cockfighting area vile and disgusting acts, are quite all right with calf roping.

But I’ll say this: At least in dog fighting and cockfighting the dogs and chickens have a chance of victory. Somebody tell me where this happens in calf roping. Somebody tell me why it’s okay for some prick on a horse to throw a noose around the neck of a running calf and jerk that calf off his feet. Then I want somebody to tell me why it’s okay for this prick to then grab this calf and painfully flip the calf onto its back, all so that he can rope the calf’s feet.

Why is this okay? What kind of society condones this brutal action?

I want to know where the outrage is. Why don’t you Michael Vick haters make your voices known come rodeo time?

Sure, I know. Most of you don’t go to the Rodeo for the rodeo. You go for the concert. And you probably don’t get there until about the time that some bull is stomping on some asshole’s head (and don’t get me started on the brutality here). But do you know what: The rodeo officials don’t care if you come out for the events. They make their money off of you coming to the concert. So as long as you’re there for Hannah Montana, you’re giving them the money to stage calf roping. And I hope that your young tyke asks you why it’s okay to do brutal things to calves, but not to dogs. And I hope that you answer that you’re hypocritical fucking asshole who deserves to have a rope thrown around your neck while you’re running a 4.5 40-yard-dash so that you can be tossed onto your back so that your hands and feet can be tied.

What Michael Vick did was wrong. But the rodeo is just as bad, if not worse. And I want you people bitching about this as loudly as you did about Vick. Sadly, I fear the only loud complaints that I will hear about the Houston Livestock Show and Rodeo will be about the outrageous concession prices and the awful Reliant Stadium sound system.

Oh well. I should know better. But is it too much to ask for a little consistency here? I’m afraid the answer is yes. -- John Royal

P.S.: Animal-right activists itself did some good work with this last year. And I don’t think PETA members will actually be attending the rodeo. I’m talking to all of you who were bitching about how evil Michael Vick was because of his treatment of dogs. And while I like to make fun with animal-rights activists, I just want to say that I’m fully with them on the treatment of the cattle at the rodeo, and it would be really nice for you Michael Vick haters out there to be just as outraged over the treatment of these calves.

I know, you might have to give up your Miley Cyrus tickets, but you know what, it’s a lot cheaper to see her concert movie than it is to go the Houston Rodeo – and the sound will be a lot better, too.

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