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Do's & Don'ts For The (Alleged, ALLEGED) "High-Priced" Hooker Getting A Mugshot

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Houston cops recently arrested a group of what the media described as "high-priced call girls" at a private event at a Midtown club.

"This is a party that was organized on a Web site that caters to mainly prostitution," said Lt. C. Vasquez with HPD's vice division.

Police said they managed to infiltrate the escort site, which actively tries to weed out authorities, and learn about the party.

"It took about four months to get in there, from beginning to end," Vasquez said.

Where there are arrests of alleged High-Priced Call Girls, there are mugshots of alleged High-Priced Call Girls.

Assuming you're an alleged high-priced call girl posing for a mugshot, what are some tips you can use?

1. Don't look so pissed off that no jury will want to let you walk free on the streets.

  

Vicki Alvarez, you are Not to be Messed With.

2. On the other hand, don't look like you're having the time of your life.

Jeri Jones, you look more like a secretary too heavy into the office-party egg nog than you do a falsely accused woman suffering the most excruciatingly embarrassing screw-up of her life. What the hell, the crazy mugshot smile worked for Tom DeLay; maybe it will work for you.

3. Suck in those cheekbones!!!

If you're going for the 1940s glamor-girl look, then work it. April Williams looks like a woman who Sam Spade knew was Trouble as soon as she crossed her gams in his office and blew out a smoke ring. Of course, she is innocent until proven guilty, so we can only say she also has a bit of the alleged-hooker-with-the-heart-of-gold thing going on.

4. "Just Been Fucked" hair is probably not a good style choice. 

A few minutes of quick primping, Christine Henderson a/k/a Christine Guerra, and it won't look like you were just interrupted doing something an alleged hooker might allegedly be doing.


5. And for the men....Definitely, definitely rock the Old Elvis look.

`Cause chicks dig it, as Randal Anderson knows. And if they don't, they're allegedly hookers, and you're allegedly a customer, so no problem.


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