The Houston Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals describes Prince, the cat pictured above, as "a gentle, kind kitty."
HSPCA Ve haff vays of makink you adopt.
Really? This dude looks like a sinister evil genius plotting world domination. Seriously, would you ever want to get this look from a pet? And he's giving this look when he has a full plate of food in front of him. We can't imagine how malevolent and threatening he appears when he's hungry and unserved.
We're pretty sure he meows in a foreign accent, too.
He obviously has brainwashed the HSPCA into thinking otherwise:
Prince was rescued as a stray, according to shelter spokeswoman Meera Nandlal, but he's already been house-trained and has excellent manners. He's a gentle, kind kitty who loves attention and is ready for a home where he can stay forever.
Substitute "secret lair" for "home" and we'll be more likely to buy it.
If, however, your wish is to become a henchman for a blackhearted megalomaniac dedicated to enslaving the planet, Prince's ID number is A13361216 and the HSPCA website is here.
Update: We tweeted a link to this item and got this response from @Stichtag:
@HairBallsNews Is it just me or is this hilarious? bit.ly/kWZrAi it's just you, asshole. Homeless pets are NEVER "evil" or "hilarious"