For Astros Opening Day: Orbit, the Phantom of Minute Maid (VIDEO)

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The Astros' 2013 season begins this weekend, and whether that's good or bad news depends on how much of a masochist you are.

The team has been historically, utterly putrid the past two years, and detecting any signs of improvement in the recent offseason would require the most powerful neutron microscopes.

How bad is it? The Astros' total player payroll is projected to be $25 million. That may sound like a lot, but in major league baseball circles, that figure means you've got a frequent-shopper card for the dollar store.

The bright side? If they win the World Series, they will be the all-time top lovable-underdog story in baseball history, or at least the subject of countless bar debates on that point with fans of the 1969 Miracle Mets.

The downside? We all know that miracle story ain't going to happen.

Still, Minute Maid remains a convenient, comfortable place to catch a game, and plenty (and we mean plenty) of good seats are available, at decent prices.

You won't be alone, though. As shown in this video -- shot by Monica Fuentes, with photos by Jeff Myers -- Orbit has made Minute Maid his home.

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