For May Day: Five Best Dirty, Rotten, Stinking Commies In The Movies

Once a pre-Christian celebration of the beginning of the summer, May 1 became associated with the labor movement and was eventually appropriated by the Soviet Union. The Cold War has been over for almost 20 years, so what better way to commemorate May Day than by poking fun at some famous movie Commies?

5. Crack Red Army paratroops -- Red Dawn (1984)

When the history of World War III is finally written, the Soviet Union's decision to invade Colorado will be listed as a military blunder on par with the invasion of Afghanistan.

Still, how the hell did they get all the way to Colorado?

4. Commie Martians -- Invaders from Mars (1953)

The message behind this thinly veiled allegory for Stalinist takeover is clear: only Commies beat their kids. Modern FBI domestic assault records notwithstanding.

3. Not Gorbachev -- Rocky IV (1985)

I'm taken back to the time I saw this in the theater with my parents, and my Dad -- doing his best Ronald Reagan impersonation -- said, "Well, I'm not gonna change." Luckily, Rocky and the Soviet leader were able to hold their own summit.

2. Mrs. Iselin (Angela Lansbury) -- The Manchurian Candidate (1962)

I have nothing to say that could add to Lansbury's excellent performance. I will, however, echo the first YouTube comment and say that if you like this movie you should totally listen to "Operation: Mindcrime" by Queensryche.

1. Lt. Cmdr. Tom Ferrell (Kevin Costner) -- No Way Out (1987)

2007's Mr. Brooks marked Costner's first return to a bad guy role, meaning he was somehow able to avoid being typecast after No Way Out's shocker of an ending. And no, you don't get spoiler warnings for 20-year old movies. Grow up.

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