Houston's Worst Delinquents for Fines and Fees: An Appraisal

Mayor Annise Parker announced today a coming crackdown on the almost $1 billion in fees and fines owed to the City of Houston by various business entities and people.

So pay up if you owe. They're talking about suing, slapping boots on cars, etc.

The city also released a list of the major delinquents in various categories. Among the things we learned:

5. No rental-car driver gives a shit about red-light cameras Among the owners of cars with the biggest backlog of red-light camera fines: Hertz, Enterprise, Alamo and PV Holding. Also Lashonda Pierce.

4. "Xzvier Conley" This one worries us. Because our name is Richard Francis Xavier Connelly, and no one ever spells "Connelly" correctly (to be fair, they do usually ace the "Xavier" part), and we have a teenaged son whose nuanced understanding of parking regulations doesn't always comport with The Man's. Still, we'd be hard-pressed to see him coming up with $11,115 in tickets and fines in only a couple years of driving. Right? Right?

3. Wu Shu Kung Fu Federation They owe $5,625 in past due rent for convention facilities, the city says. You wanna go get it from them? Didn't think so.

2. The Houston Symphony Society The Houston Symphony Society, on the other hand, owes $4,961 in the same type of fees. Surely you can intimidate those dudes.

1. Parking: What Brown Can't Do for You UPS has almost a thousand parking citations totaling almost $120,000. FedEx? A measly 267 for $22,000. Whether FedEx is more conscientious about parking -- or paying its tickets -- is difficult to determine. Of course, $22K is still a pretty impressive total.

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