I Wanna Be Your Dog (or Cat): Resolution Time

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New year. New decade. New mayor. New director of the Bureau of Animal Regulation and Care. But same old problem: Too many awesome dogs and cats stuck behind bars, the clock ticking as they wait for a good home. Hair Balls is hoping that, along with the traditional new year's resolutions of going back to the gym and quitting crack, enough Houstonians have resolved to adopt or foster a four-legged friend. If you've never been to BARC, maybe this can be the year. We guarantee you will fall in love with at least one of the critters there. Here's just an example of the dogs you'll see, along with their own new year's resolutions.


ROSIE  A1012824

This 6-year-old spayed beagle found herself in the same unfortunate boat as too many other lovely animals. And the name of that boat is the S.S. Douchebag, whose cap'n and crew consist of owners who surrendered their pets because they had to "move." Honestly, we cannot even visualize the act of handing a dog this freakin' cute over to a stranger and then walking away forever. While we wish Rosie would have resolved to track down her former owner and pee on his or her shoes, Rosie tells us her new year's resolution is to go back to college and get that sociology degree.


JOJO A1012929

Like Rosie, this three-year-old pomeranian/chihuaha mix was surrendered by his owner. His owner claimed Jojo cost too much. This might have something to do with Jojo testing low-positive for heartworms, or it might have something to do with the fact that Jojo's former owner is a dick. The jury's still out on that one. But in the meantime, this kick-ass canine can be all yours. And you can even help out Jojo with his new year's resolution, which is to track down his former owner and yell at him for giving Jojo a chick's name.  


DIDI A1011421

This eight-year-old black welsh/corgi mix was a stray. We're hoping someone will give the ol' gal a good home. All Didi wants out of life is to curl up in your lap and watch Murder She Wrote. Her new year's resolution is to improve her canasta game.



Here's a dog that won't take up much room. This year-old chihuaha mix would be great for anyone living in a studio apartment or a refrigerator box over a heating grate. Precious was a stray, which means she's seen things, but hopefully her young age has kept her from being too jaded. Because she's only a year old, this is the first chance she's had to make a resolution. And that is to stop sending postcards to Ryan Seacrest.


SCRUFFY A1012625

Now here's a dog's dog. This two-year-old American bulldog mix is a pure classic. We are extremely concerned about the mental well-being of his former owner, who said he had to surrender Scruffy because he had "no time." Apparently, he had more pressing matters, like taking classes at Ass-Clown University, or finally tracking down that snipe his friends keep telling him about. Scruffy's resolution is to lick your face.


As always, Hair Balls is indebted to Robyn Arouty's wonderful photography. And remember, there are still PetSmart gift cards available for the first few folks who adopt an animal featured in any of these Hair Balls columns. Start the year off right, folks!     

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