Japanese Army Has Not -- Repeat Not -- Shot Loyal Americans At Fort Bliss

Here's a press-release headline you don't see every day: "Japanese Troops Conduct Successful Patriot Firings At Fort Bliss."

It seems to leave the impression that there's a lot of news we need to catch up on from the weekend. Like the whole Japanese Army takeover of Fort Bliss and the surrounding mopping-up of those last few resistance cells yelling "Wolverine!!"

A closer examination reveals that members of the Japanese Air Self-Defense Force (Apparent motto: "We will never, ever invade anyone again. Really.") successfully conducted a few practice tests of the Patriot missle.

Take that, Mothra!!

-- Richard Connelly

We use cookies to collect and analyze information on site performance and usage, and to enhance and customize content and advertisements. By clicking 'X' or continuing to use the site, you agree to allow cookies to be placed. To find out more, visit our cookies policy and our privacy policy.

Newsletters

All-access pass to the top stories, events and offers around town.

  • Top Stories
    Send:

Newsletters

All-access pass to top stories, events and offers around town.

Sign Up >

No Thanks!

Remind Me Later >