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Miss Pop Rocks: I Think Babies Need to Grow a Pair

Can I rant for a minute? Okay, so I’m at the Kroger the other day, and I see this mother pushing her kid in a grocery cart, and the cart had

this weird fabric protector

over the seat part. After a little detective work, I discovered from my friends with kids that these covers are not meant as a way to jazz up the rather utilitarian grocery cart, but in fact are intended to protect the precious next generation from germs.

I mean, are we serious, people? Is this what we as a society have come to? That we are willing to spend our hard-earned dollars covering up a grocery store seat so the fruits of our loins won’t get a cold? (And why is it that despite the popularity of these covers, snot still seems to be coming out of babies’ noses at all hours of the day?)

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But this blog isn’t really about baby seat covers per se. It’s about the fact that we are creating a generation of coddled weaklings. I’ll admit straight up that I haven’t spawned yet, so parents out there, forgive me. I can’t speak from personal experience as a mother. However, I can speak as a former baby, and let me tell you that in the mid 70s my parents allowed me to roll down stairs for fun, climb on a jungle gym that was built on top of a concrete slab, play with wooden toys purchased at yard sales, and suck lead paint chips. Actually, they didn’t let me suck on the chips, but I did get to handle them. And I turned out fine.

It seems, however, that in the last ten or 15 years, we have started treating all babies as if each and every one is the proverbial Second Coming. Gone are the days when babies were made because Pa and Ma needed help milkin’ the cows. Now we act as if our little Golden Children need to be put into a precious glass bubble until they turn 18 and are released to take their well-deserved places as Kings and Queens of The World. From the $700 Bugaboo stroller to freaky deaky Baby Einstein videos to aromatherapy for infants, we need to get a grip, or it’s likely the Russians really will take over this time (even in their weakened state).

Fortunately, I’m not alone…go here for one dad’s take on the most over-the-top stupid baby products out there…including a pair of fake hands to “hold” your infant while it sleeps…the picture MUST be seen to be believed. I mean, WTF?!?!? – Jennifer Mathieu

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