More Semen Means Less Depression for Women, Surgeon Writes

Want to make a woman less depressed? Pump some semen into her. Apparently any orifice will do.

Of course, that means having unprotected sex, so the above advice, given in a recent issue of Surgery News, the journal of the American College of Surgeons, is causing some problems.

The magazine has retracted the article containing it and is re-writing it, according to the Chronicle of Higher Education.

Dr. Lazar Greenfield, a professor emeritus in the department of surgery at the University of Michigan at Ann Arbor, had written a Valentine's Day column noting studies about the effect semen has on women (besides the obvious occasional one).

He wrote:

Female college students having unprotected sex were significantly less depressed than were those whose partners used condoms. ... The benefits of semen contact also were seen in fewer suicide attempts and better performance on cognition tests.

The punch line? "So there's a deeper bond between men and women than St. Valentine would have suspected, and now we know there's a better gift for that day than chocolates."

Funny!! Except for the part where it seems to be encouraging female college students to have lots of unprotected sex, and all.

Greenfield had been president-elect of the College of Surgeons; that is "under review," but he has resigned as editor of the organization's publication.

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Richard Connelly
Contact: Richard Connelly