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NFL Review, Week One: Ahman Green, Cedric Benson, Tom Brady and Rosario Dawson

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I’ve got a breaking news flash for those of you who haven’t checked out the Chron today. Houston Texans running back Ahman Green is injured. Yeah, I know, it’s shocking. Green has always been one of those ironmen of football. But apparently he hurt his ankle during the game on Sunday.

The Texans will start auditioning some free agent running backs to handle Green’s role and to work as a complement to rookie running back Steve Slaton. And despite what Cedric Benson said on Saturday, the Texans are not bringing him for a look-see.

Now I know that Benson has had a few problems lately – like those two arrests. And I know that his teammates in Chicago didn’t think too much of him. But I thought our society was supposed to be about second chances. And I don’t much see what’s wrong with giving Benson a second chance. Who else are the Texans going to try? A washed up Shaun Alexander? They rejected Tatum Bell last week. Is Gary Kubiak going to give Ron Dayne another call? Is he waiting to see if the Broncos are going waive any of their running backs? Hell, why doesn’t he check and see if Domanick Davis Williams is still sitting around and doing nothing.

Look, when the running game is as bad as the Texans running game, you can’t afford to be choosy. Of course, if Duane Brown doesn’t get his act together on the offensive line, Adrian Peterson could be taking the ball from Matt Schaub every week while averaging minus-five yards a carry.

But that’s not the real breaking news flash. I’ve got more news. Did you know that the Texans are actually favored to win Sunday’s game against the Baltimore Ravens? I kid you not. It’s true. Never mind that the Ravens actually won a game on Sunday while the Texans had their butts kicked. So get on that plane to Vegas and bet the house on the Ravens.

AROUND THE NFL:

New England Patriots male model quarterback Tom Brady is out for the season. And watching ESPN yesterday, I couldn’t help but think that this is one of the signs of the apocalypse. I don’t know about you, but I’m confident in the ability of Bill Belichick to find a new way to cheat so that the Patriots continue to win. So what if their new quarterback is Matt Cassel – the brother of Astros pitcher Jack Cassel – and so what if he hasn’t started a game at QB since his days at high school? These are the Patriots.

The Tennessee Titans are also dealing with a quarterback problem. Vince Young appears to have quit on his team during yesterday’s game, then he was injured, and he will now be out for two to four weeks. Kerry Collins will serve as the QB in Young’s place, and once again, I’m sure the Titans will survive as they seemed to do okay under Collins last season.

But if I were a fan of one of those teams, I would be disturbed that both have decided to workout Chris Simms. Though I suppose it would be funny if Simms ended up in Tennessee and the QB controversy between these two that existed while they were at UT is started all over again.

****************** Perhaps the most amazing moment of the weekend was that Matt Ryan, the rookie QB of the Atlanta Falcons, threw a touchdown pass on the very first throw of his career. And Baltimore Ravens rookie QB Joe Flacco also got his first TD yesterday when he scrambled for the touchdown that proved to be the winning score over the Cincinnati Bengals.

Yet somehow the Ravens and Falcons were able to win with rookies while the Texans got their asses stomped with a veteran QB. Then again, the Falcons and Ravens didn’t have to deal with the same Pittsburgh Steelers defense that overwhelmed the Texans.

****************** The Upset Games of the Week were the Chicago Bears defeating the Indianapolis Colts in the Colts’ very first game at their brand new retractable roof stadium. And I also enjoyed seeing Jake Delhomme lead his Carolina Panthers to the last second win over the San Diego Chargers in San Diego. But the very best part of the Panthers victory was that, for some reason, FOX announcer Dick Stockton and the FOX stats/graphics crew thought that that catch was made by actress Rosario Dawson and not Panthers tight end Dante Rosario. – John Royal

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