Nine Awful, Terrible, "What Were They Thinking?" Political Halloween Masks

You're deep into your Halloween plans, possibly distracted by the presidential race. Or possibly not.

Should you combine the two and do your trick-and-treating dressed as one of the leading pols of the day?

You might want to think twice about your answer. A survey of Halloween Web sites shows that maskmakers haven't exactly nailed down the job of portraying anyone you'd want to go as.

In other words, your final decision may result in an evening full of explaining just who the hell you're supposed to be to people who have no idea.

As with these nine masks:

9. Mitt Romney "Generic white male/Game Show Host" model XK-4382, ready to be adapted to your latest GOP nominee.

8. Sarah Palin The red, white and blue earrings are a nice touch. Since they portray an elephant, they're also useful in eliminating any female-Democrat guesses, which is a big help.

7. Michelle Obama Ways in which this mask resembles Michelle Obama: 1) It depicts a black woman; 2) the receipt will say "Michelle Obama mask."

6. George Washington Nothing says "party" like the Father of Our Country!! Just be sure to have your full arsenal of wooden-teeth jokes ready to slay!!

5. Dick Cheney An avuncular Dick Cheney, no less. The apparent lack of eyeholes symbolizes the inability to see what kind of a deathtrap morass Iraq would become, as opposed to that whole "welcome us as liberators" kind of thing.

4. Barack Obama Yeah, sure, what the hell -- this is a mask of Barack Obama. But if you have to ask....

3. Ghoulish Barack Obama Because his socialist plans are undead and are eating the brains of our country and death panels and whatever the hell else Sean Hannity and Rush were talking about today.

2. Barackula See above.

1. Afro-bama Get a haircut, hippie!!

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