Roger Clemens to the Sugar Land Skeeters: Who's His Host Family?

The Sugar Land Skeeters have been drawing decent crowds to Constellation Field in their inaugural season, but they no doubt will be turning away fans in the near future on some days.

Word has leaked out, first via the indefatigable Mark Berman (as far as we can tell, at least) that Roger Clemens will be pitching for the Skeeters on Saturday.

Assuming he doesn't get shelled by the Bridgeport Bluefish (Hey, Shea Hillenbrand is still around!), we can assume the Rocket will pitch further games that fit his convenience. It's how he operated as an Astro, after all.

Clemens is 50, but that shouldn't raise too many eyebrows since the Skeeters' Atlantic League is filled with near-elderly former major-leaguers trying to hang onto their former diamond dreams. (They're balanced nicely with young never-will-bes who can afford not to give up on their MLB pipe dream just yet.)

We have two questions.

1) Is this how Clemens got his spot?

To request a tryout: If you think you have what it takes, email your player resume to playerdevelopment@SugarLandSkeeters.com.

We like to imagine Clemens obsessively checking his AOL account after he sends his e-mail, looking for a response, rebooting the computer because obviously it's frozen, then sending another e-mail asking if the team has received the first one he sent, etc., etc.

2. Who will be Clemens's host family? Of course, the Rocket lives relatively nearby (Sugar Land considers itself to be "relatively nearby" everywhere in Houston, fwiw), but we're sure he wants to do things right.

And that means living with a host family.

Being a host family is a fantastic experience, the Skeeters tell prospective participants: "Players in the league have always been very appreciative of the willingness of host families to open their homes and in a way, adopt them into their family. These relationships are often maintained long past the time that the player lives with their host family."

And you don't have to worry about Clemens being too demanding or disrupting your lifestyle:

Host families are more than welcome to set certain parameters regarding the living environment, and certain expectations that must be met. After all, it is still your home.

So if you see any bloody needles or soaked FedEx packages, you just march yourself right into the Rocket's room and put your foot down.

And wait until he gets Rusty Hardin on his speed-dial.

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