Rusty Hardin, Super Lawyer

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I hope you have perused the

Rusty Hardin client chart

devised by Richard Connelly. If anything gives you a little idea about the career of Rusty Hardin and the type of law he handles, this chart is a good primer.

Note that I said good. But not great. And it’s not great because Richard forgot a few of Rusty’s bigger clients. That’s where I come in. I can use this interweb thing to further educate the Press’s readers. So, without further ado, here are a few clients Richard forgot…

Remember when Warren Moon was arrested for spousal abuse? Back when the city of Houston suddenly discovered the Chron hadn’t been telling all of us the truth about Moon? Well, guess who Moon’s attorney was. Yep, Rusty Hardin. The result was an acquittal and further football playing time for Moon.

And if you’re a famous athlete with a bit of a drinking problem, Rusty’s your guy. He handled the DWIs of former Houston Rocket Scottie Pippen and current Rocket Steve “Stevie Franchise” Francis. And when Rudy Tomjonavich got in trouble for drunk driving, it was Rusty Hardin who got the case dismissed.

But Rusty handles more than just drunk athletes. When former Red Sox, Yankee and Devil Ray third baseman Wade Boggs was accused of assaulting a flight attendant on the Yankees charter flights, Rusty Hardin was the guy who got Boggs off the hook.

Are you kind of sensing a pattern here? That he handles mainly pricks and drunks? From what we’ve seen, Roger Clemens definitely fits into the prick category.

I’m not done though, because now it’s time for me to address my favorite Hardin case of all time. The strange, sad, funny case of Bert Keller.

You guys remember Bert Keller, don’t you? He was a young hotshot city councilman in the late 90s who was a darling of the conservatives. It would come out that guy had a bit of a drinking problem and liked to hang out at some of the city’s finest gentlemen’s establishments. It also came out that his wife was having an affair with another Houston city councilman who was also a hotshot conservative and was supposedly Keller’s best friend.

And one night, a smashed Keller drove away from Centerfolds, crashed his car into a tree, and decided to leave the scene. But not before Keller made sure the witnesses knew his name, knew he was on the city council, and knew he couldn’t be arrested because “the judge” was out to get him because he was sleeping with “the judge’s” wife. He also left his briefcase in the car.

I will always remember this matter because Keller was charged with fleeing the scene, but Hardin came up with the best defense I have ever heard: everybody knew the guy’s name and where he lived – leaving the briefcase also helped provide him with an identity – so he wasn’t really fleeing the scene.

And Rocket, let’s hope for your sake that Hardin doesn’t piss off Congress like he did the Arthur Andersen trial judge. Things might not come off so well for you. – John Royal

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