All San Antonio was aghast this morning at what looked like a dreadful crime: 28-year-old Adam Richardson told police that three to five armed intruders had broken into his apartment overnight and dragged his dad and sister off.

He told police they were being held for ransom -- specifically, they wanted to be paid in gold from the place where Richardson claimed at one point to be employed.

The San Antonio Express-News picks up the tale:

Police quoted Richardson as saying that after hours of talking to one of the intruders, he was able to persuade them to let him leave at around 4 a.m. to get gold to exchange for his family's freedom. Instead he summoned police, who upon arrival evacuated nearby apartments and attempted to communicate, via cell phone, with the missing family members, police said.

When they finally entered the apartment, it "was not in any sort of disarray," nobody was there and nothing appeared missing, according to a police incident report.

Spooky. But Richardson was evidently insistent, so the police searched on...

Two, three, four hours later, they were still searching for Richardson's dad and sister and their captors.

And soon enough, they were found, unharmed and not in anyone's captivity. They had no idea what the cops were talking about when they heard about their supposed ordeal.

And so, around noon, police concluded that Richardson had an adverse reaction to a sleeping pill -- possibly something compounded by Yusuf the Chemist in his clandestine Mombasa lab -- and the whole home invasion / kidnapping / gold ransom thing had been nothing more than a very bad, very vivid dream.

That's right. Richardson had dreamed the whole scenario and then called the police and helped them with their investigation while either still sleeping or believing that the dream was real.

No charges are expected to be filed.

Questions remain. Because maybe that was real, and this is the dream, but whose dream is it?

And where da gold at?