Apparently, there is a debate over the practice of hunting deer in captivity in the state of Texas. I grew up with a father who loved the outdoors, so much so he worked as an outdoor writer and broadcaster for many years. While he was more into fishing than hunting, he did like to go out and shoot at the occasional critter, though he gave up deer hunting later in life, I think because he developed a soft spot for furry creatures.
Even I have hunted, when I was a kid, but I really have no dog in this race. Ted Nugent, who is a Texas resident (God help us), clearly does and told a Texas House committee that he hunts 300 days every year. Holy crap, that's a lot of hunting. As you might imagine, the Motor City Madman takes issue with being told what he can hunt.
But, to be honest, that isn't what interested me about this story. What interested me is the fact that the committee that handles these matters is the Culture, Recreation and Tourism Committee. I understand that they represent quite a wide range of issues and hunting certainly falls under recreation in the Lone Star State, but it made me wonder what else they manage.
According to the committee Web site, they have jurisdiction over the following:
the Gulf States Marine Fisheries Compact, the Parks and Wildlife Department, the Texas Commission on the Arts, the State Cemetery Committee, the Texas State Library and Archives Commission, the Texas Historical Commission, the State Preservation Board, the San Jacinto Historical Advisory Board and, an [sic] office of state government to the extent the office promotes the Texas music industry.
Talk about a wildly divergent range of interests, into which the Nuge ironically fits quite neatly.
But think for a minute what interests you must have to fit into every category. You would have to like to hunt and fish. You would need to be an arts patron (or artist) who also loves (or plays) music. You would need to like to read and appreciate the history of Texas. You'd also need to have a fascination with (or work in the field of) dead people.
Now, we all know that Terrible Ted likes to hunt and fish. That's a given. He's a musician, so that covers that. He does like to read, though it's mostly the Bible and perhaps Ayn Rand. Despite being from Detroit, he is clearly interested in Texas and possesses at least a bit of knowledge of its history. I don't know about his interest in art, but I'd be willing to bet he owns a velvet Elvis or two. Still, that leaves the whole cemetery thing.
Then I found these lyrics to the song "Where Have You Been All My Life":
Oh, you naked women, running 'round in my head I said, all you naked women, running 'round in my head Lord, you'll just have to be there Till I'm buried and dead I said, Lord you'll just have to be there Till I'm buried and dead
There you go. There is clearly no better person on the planet to speak to this particular committee. I propose he remain a regular fixture -- I'm sure they'd love it since they cornily joked about "Cat Scratch Fever" and applauded after he spoke -- and give random soliloquies on everything from fishing and hunting to the proper methods of cremation. One thing is for sure, that would make for entertaining committee meetings.
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