Ten Social Networking Wearables

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Tweet rings. They are real. When we first saw this idea for a ring with a Tweet engraved on it, we thought there's no way it could be true. It was. It is. We're still flummoxed. But it doesn't stop there. There are also Tweet necklaces shaped like little birds, God help us.

In the midst of our confusion, we started to realize that there are a bunch of opportunities out there to capitalize on this social networking thing the kids are so into by selling stuff people can wear related to all the different Web sites. Our brains went into high gear and we came up with a list of ten social networking wearables.

Perhaps one of these would make a nice Valentine's Day gift for your beloved. Perhaps not.

10. Flickr Camera Watch

Now, just like that stereotypical Asian guy at the bar in Private Benjamin you can snap photos of unsuspecting women and shout, "I just took your picture, mama!" Best pickup line EVER! When you're done wooing the ladies, you can post your exploits on Flickr. Aw yeeeeah!

9. Chatroulette Tear-Away Shorts

When you are in the middle of a heated discussion on the popular video chat service, you never know when you need to get your pants off quick. With these tear-away shorts, you never have to worry again.

8. Foursquare Mayoral Campaign T-Shirts

The sad thing is, this could be a real shirt. 7. deviantART Chocolate Syrup & Body Paint (hot women only)

If you are a hot young girl without really any artistic abilities, but you happen to have an old Polaroid camera you found at a secondhand store, this is for you. Pour liberally over you and/or your friends. Snap dimly lit, overly flash-saturated images and post on deviantART, or sell to American Apparel.

6. ReverbNation Ear Plugs

When the music is really shitty, only ReverbNation brand ear plugs can save you.

5. Google Buzz Urban Sombrero

Just as Elaine's J. Peterman Urban Sombrero was a horror, so too was the Google service some claimed would challenge Twitter and Facebook for social networking dominance. Combine the awkwardness and unpopularity of both into a hat made of pure awesome.

4. Classmates.com Platform Goldfish Shoes

This is the perfect way to say to the world, "I'm completely outdated and I don't care who knows it." 3. LinkedIN Necktie

For the most boring of all social networking sites, the most boring fashion accessory next to socks.

2. MySpace Condom

You can't be too careful when you are trolling the barely legals in the ghetto of social networking Web sites. Much like the average custom MySpace page, they come in glitter-covered pink and black with streaming heavy metal playing in the background.

1. Facebook "Poke" Panty

You know you were thinking it.

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Join the Press community and help support independent local journalism in Houston.


Join the Press community and help support independent local journalism in Houston.