This weekend is Fiestas Patrias and we’ve asked guest columnist Conchita Maria Guadalupe Maria Hortencia Juanita Maria Garcia Gomez Gonzalez de Smith to write something in honor of the occasion:

A Short History of Texas

1. We were here. 2. You came here. 3. We are still here. 4. You are pissed.

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Have a happy Fiestas Patrias everyone!