Thank You Lord, For These Thy Gifts: Five Movie Thanksgivings

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Thanksgiving isn't just about federally subsidized gluttony and a spike in domestic disturbance calls, it's about slipping into a tryptophan-induced coma while watching TV. This year, instead of enduring another slapstick performance by the Detroit Lions, how about checking out a few Turkey Day themed movies?

5. The Ice Storm (1997)

For the record, this is the second time (see also Addams Family Values) that Christina Ricci has stood up for Native Americans. Who knew "Ricci" was an Iroquois name?

4. Planes, Trains, and Automobiles (1987)

The rule, in case anybody cares, is that you're allowed one f-bomb in a movie without landing an "R" rating. Some films, Live Free or Die Hard being the most recent example, muffle or otherwise obscure subsequent attempts in an attempt to toe the line. John Hughes chooses to belly flop across it.

3. Hannah and Her Sisters (1986)

They key difference between "new" Woody Allen and "old" Woody Allen is that we were able to forgive him his lecherous habit of casting the latest Hollywood piece of ass when he was actually funny. Now, instead of smartly written/acted films like HaHS, we get endless shots of Scarlett Johansson's cleavage.

Which is apparently a bad thing.

2. "Thanksgiving" trailer from Grindhouse (2007)

The "less is more" approach is intriguing, but even if you edited every one of Eli Roth's movies down to two and a half minutes, Hostel would still be an unwatchable piece of shit.

1. The Doors (1991)

Many things about this movie are spot-on: getting bombastic director Oliver Stone to helm a movie about one of the most loudly overrated bands of all time, for example, and Val Kilmer (and actor for whom narcissism has never been a stretch) playing Jim Morrison. But casting Meg Ryan -- whose closest brush with the counterculture was probably a panicky rolling up of the limousine windows as she passed a group of breakdancers -- torpedoes the film's already shaky foundations.

-- Pete Vonder Haar

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