The End: John Royal’s Super Bowl Prediction

It’s finally here. The Super Bowl. The New England Patriots attempting to become the first team to go 19-0 for a season. And the New York Giants trying to play the belittled underdog and stop the Patriots.

So what’s going to happen?

The Patriots are currently favored by 12 points, and the over/under for points to be scored in the game is 54.

Let’s look at a few things that might come into play on Sunday. Is Tom Brady injured? How badly is he injured? Will Gisele Bundchen be cast in the Jessica Simpson role? And just how pissed at Plaxico Burress is Brady? What about Randy Moss and his restraining order? Has Rodney Harrison stayed off of the juice? Has Bill Belichick put found a new way to cheat, or did he find a way to videotape the Giants defensive signals the last time they played?

And what about the Giants? Is Plaxico Burress going to regret his prediction of the Giants winning 23-17? Which Eli Manning is going to show up? The one who played most of the season, or the mistake-free version of the playoffs?

I’m calling my shot. I don’t like what I’m about to write. I really hope I’m wrong because I don’t like Bill Belichick. I don’t like how the Patriots are able to cheat and yet the press just lets it slide – it’s that baseball fan in me who’s pissed that everyone goes ballistic over cheating in baseball but doesn’t seem to care about football. I don’t want this team to go perfect.


The Patriots are going to win. And they’re going to win big. And they’re going to win by more than the point spread. This is going to make the Giants-Ravens Super Bowl look like a good game. This is going to have us longing for Bears-Patriots.

I know the Giants almost beat the Patriots in week 17. I know the Giants led much of that game. I also know the weather wasn’t good and the Patriots couldn’t fly high with their passing game. I think the Patriots are out to prove a point.

I hope I’m wrong. I hope the Patriots lose. I hope that I somehow manage to jinx the Patriots. But I don’t think it will happen. Patriots win 56-17. – John Royal

KEEP THE HOUSTON PRESS FREE... Since we started the Houston Press, it has been defined as the free, independent voice of Houston, and we'd like to keep it that way. With local media under siege, it's more important than ever for us to rally support behind funding our local journalism. You can help by participating in our "I Support" program, allowing us to keep offering readers access to our incisive coverage of local news, food and culture with no paywalls.
The Houston Press is a nationally award-winning, 32-year-old publication ruled by endless curiosity, a certain amount of irreverence, the desire to get to the truth and to point out the absurd as well as the glorious.
Contact: Houston Press