Calling all comic book nerds across the city: It’s time to drop your action hero toys and stop watching cartoon reruns because Houston has basically turned into Gotham. We have a real-life Batman to call our very own.
Well, not a real Batman, exactly. But a young-ish dude who likes to climb city buildings and snap selfies up there, and occasionally dons a Batman mask. Which amounts to pretty much the same thing, right? Yeah, yeah — minus the whole crime-fighting bit.
The man behind this mask is a cheeky Instagrammer who goes by the admittedly presumptuous (but undeniably awesome) name “Houston Hero.” Few can get away with that kind of behavior, but this gentleman’s hobby is buildering (that’s a combination of the words “bouldering” and “building,” for the less portmanteau-savvy among us). His sport is the stuff of most mortals' worst nightmares: scaling the outside of tall buildings without a rope.
"It's obviously not recommended," Houston Police Department public information officer Jodi Silva told us.
Granted, all of this seems a bit far-fetched. The Press wasn’t able to get in touch with anyone who has actually seen “Houston Hero” work his magic in person (this despite the fact that his smiley face-sprinkled Instagram posts regularly invite enthusiastic responders to tag along on climbs).
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So we can only go by what we’ve seen online: A YouTube video showing a vomit-inducing ascent to the top of an unnamed building downtown; a pair of feet dangling off the side of a ledge that’s many stories high.
The bottom line is that who the “Houston Hero” actually is remains one of the less important but more irritating secrets of the universe.
But you’ve still gotta admit that your day just got a little bit cooler.