The Week in TV: Shatner My Dad Says

I'm confused by curling, ready for spring, and oh yeah: I got engaged. This was the week in TV Land:

• There's a guy out there with a blog called "The Final Season of LOST as Seen by Someone Who Has Never Seen." I think it's missing a word at the end, but whatever. The whole gimmick is that he's never watched Lost and has decided to blog about the final season. It's about as dickish and pointless as you'd expect, and the more I think about it, the more I have to wonder why this guy's bothering. It's the digital equivalent of reading the final chapter of a novel and bitching that you don't get the references. ("Wait so like Jean Valvean has fake names? Totes lame!") Why not just watch the show from the beginning? Minus points, Internet.

• Because this is where we are as a nation: Twitter's Shit My Dad Says has been moved up from the development to the pilot stage at CBS, and William Shatner has been cast as the dad. Are the tweets funny? Yes. Is there a story there? No. This is like when a stand-up comedian gets a badly conceived show that's just a forum for them to copy and paste bits from their act into a sitcom script. (Tim Allen, we will never forget you.) There's not enough there to generate legit conflict or interest over the long haul. In a bigger picture sense, it's the latest attempt to try and capitalize on a viral or ad-based success like the Geico cavemen and turn it into a TV series, which is just the worst way to go about it. If you're going to adapt something, at least adapt a story. A string of non sequitur punch lines isn't enough to sustain a show. Then again, According to Jim ran for eight seasons, so I could be wildly underestimating the tolerance of the American people.

• I haven't watched much any Olympic coverage, but I have seen the new ad for Jay Leno's return to the blood-spattered throne of The Tonight Show. In addition to crapping on all our souls by using a version of a Beatles song, it's also remarkably douchey to have "Get back to where you once belonged" as the overriding idea of your campaign, as if you were the only one who ever had the right to do a talk show at 11:35 ET. However, bandleader/possible robot Kevin Eubanks is leaving the show, and he'll likely be gone in a few months. John Melendez will no longer do the announcing, either, though he'll probably still do some writing for them. Anyway, here's the ad. Try not to weep:

• Speaking of the Olympics, Stephen Colbert has been the only enjoyable part, playing to the bizarre jingoism of the games by issuing a special poster and also attending events just to ignore them and read Cat Fancy. It's official: Colbert has the best job in the world.

• I'm on the fence about Family Guy. There have been some genuinely funny moments, but they're typically surrounded by lazy, stupid, willfully idiotic writing that depends on a kind of Mad Libs approach to joke construction. ("This is like the time I [performed a regular action] in [an area known for its opposition to said action]!") But anything that can take Sarah Palin down another peg deserves some praise. After a shot at Palin in a recent ep -- Chris dates a handicapped girl who says her mom is the former governor of Alaska -- Palin began airing her grievances on Fox News. In a nice twist, the actress with Down syndrome who did the voice of Chris' date in the episode has come forward and slammed Palin for making her and people like her into political props. It's a great read. Check it out.

• Hey, you like buying stuff, right? Then buy some posters from Austrian graphic designer Albert Exergian, who created modern, simple posters for major American TV shows. I might have to get the one for The Wire.

• Looking ahead to the rest of the week, there's Olympic coverage every night (the ratings are doing well, so I guess you're already watching). If you hate yourself or have a mild learning disability, VH1 continues with new episodes of Celebrity Fit Club tonight (Monday). If you're a douchey guy or have a mild learning disability, Spike has a new episode of the rapey Blue Mountain State on Tuesday. HBO also has a new ep of The Ricky Gervais Show (animated versions of old podcasts) on Friday, along with The Life and Times of Tim, which is worth checking out.

KEEP THE HOUSTON PRESS FREE... Since we started the Houston Press, it has been defined as the free, independent voice of Houston, and we'd like to keep it that way. With local media under siege, it's more important than ever for us to rally support behind funding our local journalism. You can help by participating in our "I Support" program, allowing us to keep offering readers access to our incisive coverage of local news, food and culture with no paywalls.
Daniel Carlson
Contact: Daniel Carlson