The weekend's gone, the sun is out, and the only marathon I did this weekend consisted of Whataburger taquitos. This was the week in TV Land:
• So! Conan and Jay are probably not going to make buddy comedies together any time soon, or ever. The growing animosity between the two -- mainly from Conan O'Brien, who is funny and smart, aimed at Jay Leno, who is neither -- blew up like crazy last week, with Conan's nightly monologues growing progressively harsher as he attacked NBC, Jay, and the entire late-night scheduling fiasco that's pretty much put him out of a job (for now). Word is that Conan's deal to exit NBC is all but in place, and some are saying that this is his last week as host of The Tonight Show. I can't believe it's come to this, though. NBC is so desperate to destroy their own network that they're unwilling to take the kind of chances that are necessary for growth. Jay Leno hosted Tonight for three years before he overtook David Letterman; Seinfeld needed the same kind of time to become the sitcom legend it was. But Conan trailed Letterman for seven months, Leno tanked, NBC tried to shuffle, and everything fell apart. What a pathetic waste. Leno's show will be gone after the Olympics, and he'll presumably get his old gig back. Ugh.
• I watched the Golden Globes last night. I don't know why. The awards themselves are awful, hacky things, awarded by foreign press members won over by boxoffice and festival buzz. (Dude, Sandra Bullock won for The Blind Side, which fact made me want to firebomb California.) But Ricky Gervais was predictably awesome, in a take-no-prisoners approach to hosting and roasting. He and Neil Patrick Harris should be official hosts of everything. Mad Men and Glee took home awards, also predictable but solid choices.
• Good news: Friday Night Lights returns April 30 to NBC. Now I'll finally get to see what happened to Tim Riggins. If you haven't seen the show, you need to. The first season is just about perfect.
• Community and most of the rest of NBC's Thursday comedies returned last week, and though they were all strong -- Parks and Recreation is a winner in it for the long haul -- I loved Community, which featured Jack Black guesting as a needy weirdo trying to break into the group. Meta-humor, sitcom jokes, and plenty of Joel McHale. That's how you make a good half hour, kids.
• Some stuff probably happened with CBS this week, too, but really who cares. I mean, I watch How I Met Your Mother, which is still pretty cute despite Josh Radnor's earnest attempts to not have a personality. But if you expect me to report on The Good Wife or any of the CSI/NCIS franchises, you're in for disappointment.
• For those who may have missed it because they were paying attention to real things, zealot and confirmed nutbar Pat Robertson said (on camera!) that the earthquake in Haiti was attributable to the way the Haitians made a deal with the devil to escape French rule. Reached for comment, the devil said he wasn't aware of Robertson's quote, but that the guy sounds like a dick. Rachel Maddow had the Haitian ambassador on her show later in the week, and he laid back into Robertson but good.
• Seriously, the late-night thing was an amazing train wreck last week, though perhaps the highest of highlights came from Jimmy Kimmel. Kimmel had done an ep of his own show in character as Jay Leno a few days earlier -- like, the entire thing -- and it was a beautiful, scathing takedown of Leno's hackery. For some reason, Leno had Kimmel on his show a couple nights later to do a 10-questions bit via satellite. I guess Leno thought Kimmel would make a couple jokes but ultimately cave and not be that mean since they were speaking directly to each other. Oh, how Leno was wrong. I'm sure many of you have seen this clip already, but for the sheer joy of watching Kimmel annihilate Leno (while Leno's audience laughs), here's what I'm talking about:
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