The World of Flomax...It's About Getting on Boats and All Kinds of Manly Shit Like That

(Editor's Note: No, the Miss Pop Rocks crown was not recently passed to our ex-web editor, Keith. It was an unfortunate byline error; Jennifer is still in charge.)

Flomax. First of all, the name is ridiculous. I get that the ads are targeted at dudes with enlarged prostates who can't whiz, but you would think if not whizzing was your problem, the name Flomax sort of implies you are going to be whizzing all the ding dang time. What about Floright? Or Goodflo? I think those would be better names.

I'm puzzled by the Flomax ads. I guess they're supposed to show what guys do. Apparently, guys go to baseball games and get on boats a lot. Like, seriously a lot of boats. They're just patting each other on the back and doing one-armed man hugs and walking around on the decks of boats with their jacked up junk forcing them to go to the john every five minutes with nothing coming out. Sheesh...they need some Flomax like right quick!

I feel bad for men. I think we're basically living in an era where men don't know how to be men anymore. The rules are not there. I mean, it's bad enough for women with the mommy wars and the ticking biological clock and Paris Hilton, but these poor men...they don't know what they're supposed to do or how they're supposed to act at all, especially once they're together. And these ad people clearly get that, so they're trying to create these forced moments for guys where they're into their manhood or whatever. Like kayaking and riding bikes and driving around in old cars. And there's always one black guy in the bunch to show they're super diverse, too. One guy needs to be wearing a rainbow pin, I think. Gay dudes have prostate trouble too, I'm sure.

I don't know what else to say. I'm just sad for dudes. I'm sorry, men, if you have prostate trouble. I hope Flomax helps you. But seriously, get off the boat once in a while. Staring at all that water all the time cannot be helping your problem.

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