During halftime of a recent New Orleans Hornets game, a fan participated in a common giveaway contest. He had to make a layup, a free throw, a three-pointer and a shot from halfcourt under a time limit to win a prize. Unlike the vast majority of those who take the floor for such contests, he actually did it, nailing every shot.
Most would assume the prize for this sort of feat would be significant. After all, to do what he did, under the pressure of time and the screams of thousands of drunk fans, is impressive. Other teams have, with sponsors, given away airline tickets, cash sometimes worth $10,000 and new cars or trucks; perfectly appropriate prizes.
Unfortunately, this poor bastard had to win at a Hornets game. Their grand prize: a year's supply of 7UP, which equates to a case a month or just under a hundred bucks worth of limon refreshment.
Given the spirit of this contest and the struggles of our own local teams, we came up with five giveaway contests we're sure the teams in H-Town will consider perfect for their next halftime.
5. Contest: Hit a layup without breaking your ankle. Prize: Yao Ming's leftover shoes Clearly, your feet don't need as much protection as Yao's
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4. Contest: Eat as many hot dogs as possible while catching fly balls in left field. Prize: $16 million You get a bonus if you get more than two hits in ten tries off of a children's tee.
3. Contest: Guess who the Rockets will draft in the first round. Prize: Chris Bosh's discarded iPad. Someone should put it to good use since he threw it out along with the Rockets' hopes and dreams last summer.
2. Contest: Intercept a pass or sack the quarterback during a 2-on-2 flag football game at Reliant Stadium. Prize: A starting job on the Texans defense. Considering the Texans defense, it would be a substantial upgrade.
1. Contest: Throw a pitch that clocks better than 85 mph on the radar gun. Prize: Free steroid...er...B12 and lidocaine injections for life. It worked for Roger Clemens.