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Top Down: No Strippers? No Super Bowl

Photo by Daniel Kramer

The city of Houston is making another try at hosting a Super Bowl, this time the 2012 game. I hate to be one to spread bad news, but I don’t think this is going to happen.

First, there are a bunch of small-market NFL owners who are a bit pissed at Texans owner Bob McNair, and who are probably not much for doing him favors, like giving him another Super Bowl. The way they see it, if McNair wants to hog all of his regular season revenue, why should they help him get the bucks he’d get from hosting a Super Bowl?

But that’s not the big reason. The big reason is simple. With all of the laws the city’s been working on, it’s quite possible all of the topless clubs will be shut down come 2012. Now I’m a native Houstonian, but really, what else is there for a tourist in Houston but the topless clubs?

The weather for both of Houston’s Super Bowls has been miserable. There’s nothing like South Beach or the French Quarter for the tourists to play in. So what would all of the people coming to Houston for the game do? The scenery comes from the topless women, and if they’re no longer allowed to parade around topless, why bother coming?

So, Houston, you can host a Super Bowl, or you can shut the topless clubs. But you’re probably not going to get to do both. Which is it going to be?

I don’t know about you, but I know how I’m voting. And it’s for the bare breasts. -- John Royal

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