Bobby Mote, bareback rider.
Bobby Mote, bareback rider.
Mandy Oaklander

Top Five Cowboy Moments at RodeoHouston

We've spent the past few weeks inhaling the smell of urine-soaked haybales, watching cowboy balls get trampled by bulls, and fielding accusations that we only picked the sexy cowboys to interview. (We didn't. All cowboys are, by definition, sexy.) But alas, our fling with the Houston Rodeo is finally over. Even though the championships are all handed out, Hair Balls is giving out some awards of our own for our five favorite cowboy and cowgirl interview moments.

1. Most Unintentionally Sexy Cowboy Tradition: Every time he competes, Bee Jay Scott recites a little prayer from the Bible, which he interprets as asking for a good bareback ride. "It gives you something else to think about besides bucking," he said. Which of course made us only think about wild, hot, holy bareback bucking.

2. Best Cowboy Confession: Saddle bronc rider Jace Garrett admitted to us that he got so drunk at the rodeo off of whiskey and 7, he lost his car. Luckily, he found it the next day with his keys on top.

3. Most Badass Cowboy: Every doctor at the rodeo knows Bobby Mote, who's at the clinic nearly every year. Said Dr. Michael Kent, "He had something stuck in his ear one year, and he ripped the abdominal muscles off of his pelvis, like, yesterday." Mote just popped some Ibuprofen and got on his horse. When asked about how he broke his abs, he shrugged: "Riding bareback, I guess."

4. Most Kickass Cowgirl: Barrel racer Jill Moody said she got started rodeoing because she wasn't exposed to the "horse show people," which we imagine are kind of like dog show people. Good thing, because Moody's a badass. She won $260,000 on her horse just last year. Oh, and this is all after beating cervical cancer.

5. Most Impressive Injury List: Think you're tough after sloppily surviving a beer-drenched mechanical bull once or twice? "Them mechanical bulls don't chase you down and step on you," assured bull rider Clayton Savage. He's seen it all on and off the bull. "I broke four ribs...I've been knocked out a bunch. I got hit in the head, horned in the face, stepped on...kicked in the face, the back, the chest. I've been stepped on 'down there' a couple times. I got some chipped teeth."

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