Zapruder Analysis of Four Dallas TV Women Verbally Brawling Over Michael Sam

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In the history of the NFL Draft, I don't know that more words, more tweets, more angst has been expended over a seventh round draft choice than that which has been expended over Michael Sam and the "kiss heard 'round the world."

If you put "Michael Sam" into YouTube's search box and look at the choices you are given to click on as Sam-related topics, "kiss" is at the top of the list. Ahead of draft, highlights, 40 yard dash, combine, pro day, and bench press.

Apparently, when it comes to Michael Sam, the internet comes for the kiss and then maybe -- MAYBE -- stays for the football. But either way, Michael Sam has everybody talking, and if the footage from this Dallas morning talk TV show is any indication, I don't know that that's necessarily a good thing. (Actually, what am I saying? I need CONTENT. This is a GREAT thing!)

Here's what I'm talking about.

What you're about to see is a segment of "The Broadcast," a locally based talk show on KTXD Channel 47 serving the Dallas/Fort Worth area. Essentially, it is an opinion-based show with a female panel, kind of like "The View" but with better eye candy and with the resident "old, bitter woman with strong opinions" being older and much more bitter.

If you're a Dallas area television viewer, I have no idea if this show is at all topical. I don't know if they pull a 0.01 rating, or a 13.5 share. I'm just glad they us the segment below on Michael Sam:

Ok, Zapruder time. Let's peg the highlights of what we just saw. First, so you're all aware of each of the cast members, here they are (left to right):

COURTNEY KERR: Serial interrupter

AMY KUSHNIR: Conservative advocate of keeping the gay kissing private; not long for the set

SUZIE HUMPHREYS: Wily, angry veteran, as accentuated by her Twitter handle @suziesaysso. ("And that's the bottom liiiiinnnne, because SUZIE ... SAYS SO!!!!" ... glass breaks, Steve Austin music plays...)

LISA PINEIRO: Attractive steerer of the ship; of all the hosts on the show, has the intangibles that scream "bigger things than KTXD."

1:00 -- Replay of Dale Hansen's rant on the NFL being afraid of Michael Sam, as reflected by his going in the seventh round, using the tired "How could the SEC Defensive Player of the Year possibly go in the seventh round?", ignoring the fact that many, many, many award winning college players don't even go drafted. It just so happens Michael Sam won the one award that coincidentally has ben won by a slew of subsequent first round picks. Most of the people who advocate this argument on Sam's behalf have not really watched him play. It would be fascinating to see these folks try and argue his draft slot injustice if Sam got one less vote for SEC Defensive POY (he was actually co-Defensive POY with C.J. Mosley of Alabama). Anyway, I digress...

2:00 -- Pineiro generalizes on the people who tweeted (she says "texted") derogatorily about Sam, saying "there was one NFL player" and "there was another college player" and that some nebulous "they" came down hard on them. (How hard would it be for a researcher to tell her it was Don Jones of the Dolphins and Marshall Henderson, a college basketball player, who tweeted derogatory things? Names are too much? Also, other than the Twitter mob, nobody came down hard on Henderson because he's under no one's jurisdiction right now. His college career is over, so he pretty much hangs out and presumably smokes weed most of the day.)

2:17 -- Pineiro says that "they" were fined. (Truth: Jones was, Henderson wasn't) and this upsets Kushnir and Humphreys. Kerr interrupts the conversation for the first of what feels like about 20 times in the next seven minutes, and explains that Don Jones and Marshall Henderson's repulsion with Michael Sam's kiss is "just as racist" as Donald Sterling, even though Sterling is in a position of power and has a racist rap sheet documented in court a mile high. Also, I didn't know "gay" was a race.

2:30 -- Humphreys goes on a freedom of speech, first amendment rant. The only thing missing is "Yankee Doodle Dandy" playing underneath it.

3:11 -- DING! Kerr interrupt count: 2

3:23 -- Humphreys refers to Donald Sterling as "the Clippers guy." LOVE it when four non-sportsy women gather around and feed off each of other in the name of sports discourse.

3:49 -- DING! Kerr interrupt count: 3

4:01 -- Kerr says once again that you're "racist" if you were a little queasy over Michael Sam's kiss, and Humphreys laments that "racist" is the new "word of the world." I do think that homosexuals would be interested to hear that they are now a "race," not a sexual orientation. According to Kerr, at least.

4:19 -- Pineiro actually makes the very valid point that first amendment rights don't protect you from punishment from an employer or a league body, just prosecution from the law. I do agree with Humphreys and Kushnir that the punishments are too harsh (for the Sam reaction stuff) and tough to justify, but that's a separate argument. So whether you agree with Pineiro or with Humphreys/Kushnir on this topic, I think we can all agree that Kerr sucks.

4:39 -- Uh oh, Humphreys is a Tebow lover. She's not down at all with people making fun of his prayer on the field.

4:45 -- Kushnir: "I wonder if they were fined for that..." Humphreys: "I don't know..." Do these ladies have interns??

4:54 -- Humphreys blames it all on the boogeyman that is social media, and then promptly tells Pineiro to get off of her lawn and turn that damn music down!

4:58 -- Pineiro: "It all has to do with people, frankly, being very sick of people who are being sick of hearing about it..." My head hurts.

5:28 -- HALF DING...Kerr interruption snubbed, count up to 3.5.

5:42 -- Kerr paraphrases something Kushnir said yesterday and Kushnir is getting ready to flip the table over if Kerr keeps putting words in her mouth. On a positive note, Kerr waited until everyone was done speaking to talk.

6:00 -- Kushnir: "What I was saying was ESPN promotes sportsmanship...." Somewhere Skip Bayless and Stephen A. Smith are liking the cut of Kushnir's jib.

6:29 -- Kerr is glad that the kiss is topical and out there because not too long ago, Sam would have been scorned for "coming out as a black man." Yeah, I had no idea he was black! It's good that black people are now able to reveal their being black in this day and age, and be openly black. Well played, Kerr.

7:26 -- DING! Kerr interrupt count: 4.5

7:29 -- DING! Kerr still going, half point bonus, count is at 5

7:36 -- Kerr has a serious "hair fixing" tell, in case any of you Dallas readers are playing poker with her anytime soon.

7:53 -- Kusnir just made air quotes. This thing is going off the rails.

7:56 -- DING! Kerr interrupt count: 6

8:23 -- Humphreys is loading up a Stone Cold Stunner for Kerr....

8:40 -- Kushnir says "BLEEP THIS" and walks off the set! She's had enough of Kerr's interrupting, and Kerr's hair flips, and Kerr's...well....just being KERR! She is DONE!

The station, which has probably gotten more attention in the last 12 hours than it has in its history, issued a statement on this show:

KTXD-TV started the "The Broadcast" in February 2013 as an opinion-based show. We selected five hosts who represent a subset of the vast, diverse community that we serve, and we encourage them on a daily basis to share their personal opinions on a variety of topics.

On Tuesday, May 13, that topic happened to be Michael Sam's draft day kiss and the controversy it was generating. The debate between our four hosts that day got unusually heated and ended with one host - Amy Kushnir - leaving the set. Ms. Kushnir's action was a signal of frustration on her part, as she felt she was unable to express her own views correctly.

While KTXD-TV neither supports nor condemns opinions shared by our hosts, we stand behind both "The Broadcast" and Ms. Kushnir. We wholeheartedly stand behind their right to voice their opinions as an integral part of our program. We have clearly ruffled feathers, and in doing so we hope we have advanced the dialogue on this important issue.

----Brian Joyce, Station Manager KTXD-TV

Yeah, yeah, that's all nice...now can we get Kushnir and Kerr to re-enact this on the next show?

Listen to Sean Pendergast on SportsRadio 610 from 2 p.m. to 7 p.m. weekdays. Also, follow him on Twitter at http://twitter.com/SeanCablinasian.

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