Local Spotlight

Whining and Dining: Joining the Families at King’s BierHaus

The Inglorious Bastard is quite glorious, after all.
The Inglorious Bastard is quite glorious, after all. Photo by Brooke Viggiano

Life has changed for this food writer. As a brand-new mom, poppin’ bottles has taken on a slightly different meaning. But while I find myself seeking out diaper changing tables for the first time ever, I’m still on the hunt for all the awesome happy hours, exciting menus and H-town icons. Only now, I’m bringing my baby, Quinn, along with me. This “Whining and Dining” series looks at dining out with a baby in the city (more specifically, In the Loop, because Quinn doesn’t like to travel too far from home just yet).

You aren’t going to be the only person that brought your baby to King’s BierHaus. In true Houston fashion, biergartens are fully family-friendly (especially when they are located in the Greater Heights).

Our family of three strolled right in at 2 p.m. on a Saturday. There was no line, and having been there sans baby on many a fun night, we knew exactly what we wanted: two half-liters of German bier (a Fruh Kolsch for me and the Braufactum IPA for Dave) and two Inglorious Bastards, add cheddar-bacon-bier-sauce for the fries.

At the BierHaus, you order your food and drink at a register in the front, then get a number and find yourself some seating, of which there is plenty, both inside and out on the patio. We park Quinn next to a long beer hall-style table and wait for our goodies. We also wait for our friends, who are meeting us with their own baby in tow. Though we ordered without them (it’s every man for themselves these days), we did buy them the advantage of skipping the register completely and securing a server to cover our party.

click to enlarge A bier and a napping baby: my idea of a good Saturday. - PHOTO BY BROOKE VIGGIANO
A bier and a napping baby: my idea of a good Saturday.
Photo by Brooke Viggiano
Beers come first (double claps for the fast service) and five minutes later, our friends arrive. Their baby has just turned one and can sit in a high-chair now, so her ‘rents get her situated while simultaneously looking over the bier menu. Having a full calendar year under their parental belt has made them pros, and their liters are plopped in front of them not too long after.

Turns out two more friends were around the corner taking a “yoga for couples” class (gotta love the Heights), so they join us for a few biers, too. We slide down the bench and make room. King’s is perfect for coming and going as you please — our party expanded from two to six adults with ease — which also makes it perfect for an easy-going dine with kids.

Don’t be fooled by the name. The Inglorious Bastard is quite glorious, after all. Oh-so-thin chicken schnitzel comes crisped and smothered in a creamy jaeger mushroom sauce (jaegar as in “hunter,” not as in Jägermeister). There’s hot buffalo sauce, too, but I ask for it on the side so I can add it as I please. Swiss cheese, lettuce and a fluffy, buttery bun finish out the winning sandwich. We eat, feed Quinn — who decided she wants to eat just as our Bastards show up — and order a few more drinks because we’re feeling lucky. This time, Munich Golds for us both.

We clank our glasses and say “prost” to another fun, successful outing with Quinn.

TL;DR: King’s BierHaus is no stranger to families, with a choose-your-own-adventure style of seating (there are long beer hall tables with benches and tabletops both inside and out in the yard). Bring the kiddos and unwind with German biers and some schnitzel for good measure.

Kid-Friendly Dining Essentials
Parking: Lot
Seating: Slings, high-chairs and booster seats available
Bathrooms: With diaper changing tables
Kids menu: Yes
Reservations: No
Extras: Outdoor “KinderGarten” area with games for kids

King’s BierHaus, 2044 East T C Jester, 281-990-3042
KEEP THE HOUSTON PRESS FREE... Since we started the Houston Press, it has been defined as the free, independent voice of Houston, and we'd like to keep it that way. With local media under siege, it's more important than ever for us to rally support behind funding our local journalism. You can help by participating in our "I Support" program, allowing us to keep offering readers access to our incisive coverage of local news, food and culture with no paywalls.
Brooke Viggiano is a contributing writer who is always looking to share Houston's coolest and tastiest happenings with the Houston Press readers.
Contact: Brooke Viggiano