You know those delightful artisanal sugar cookies vended by the likes of Paulie's and other fine bakeries? The ones that come in a variety of whimsical shapes and are covered in a very thin layer pastel-covered frosting?

Randall's frosted sugar cookies are nothing like them. But they are still pretty great, and here's why.

First, Randall's sugar cookies come in only one shape: giant circle. No trees or bumblebees or shamrocks or pumpkins. Such creations are cute but ultimately too tiny: who wants to eat ten-plus frosted hearts?

Second, because Randall's cookies are about three times as thick as your average sugar cookie, every bite packs in a decent amount of vanilla dough. Remarkably, the cookies' density does not prevent them from being moist and slightly chewy. No crumbly crumpets here.

Third, Randall's sugar cookies are not simply glazed and/or coated with a mere breath of icing. They are absolutely loaded with saccharine, grocery store frosting, the kind that is sure to give you a headache 30 minutes after consumption but tastes SO GOOD every once in a while. And this frosting often comes in multiple layers (e.g., fluffy white dotted with thicker red buttercream) depending on the cookie's decorations. If you're not a "frosting person," this is bad news for you; I, however, am a firm believer in a high icing-to-cake/cookie ratio.

Because the icing is rather sticky and the decorative designs often a bit sloppy, I would probably not recommend Randall's sugar cookies for elegant baby showers or upscale holiday parties. But sometimes an excessively sugary baked good is just what you need to forget about an excessively shitty day.

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