No matter how much you ate on Thanksgiving and no matter how many leftover turkey sandwiches you made -- hell, maybe you made every single amazing-sounding sandwich on Brooke Viggiano's list of ultimate leftover turkey sandwiches -- no disgusting act you committed over the holiday could come close to the horrors that lurk below.
Our own Craig Hlavaty, depressed at the loss of his favorite TV food personality -- Mr. Food, who passed away last week of pancreatic cancer -- found the following photos during his intrepid journeys through the darker portions of the Internet. If they don't make you feel better about your own gluttonous activities, maybe they'll at least put a smile on your face. (Weirdo.)
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SHOW ME HOW
So unless you bathed in dressing and gravy this year, it's safe to say you're pretty far ahead of all the folks here. Want to see more? Of course you do. Head over to World Wide Interweb, you sick puppy.
(And in case you were wondering, yes -- there is a sexual fetish called sitophilia or sploshing that involves smearing women [or sometimes men] with food. We're not posting those pictures. Go nose-dive into that terrifying corner of the Internet on your own time.)