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Keep Houston Press Free
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Stirred and Shaken: The Next Door's Bend Me Over

"The best things in life are free, so let your mind and soul be free. Only you can hold yourself back." I was reading that piece of bathroom graffiti at The Next Door (2020 Waugh, 713-520-1712), head twisted toward the wall behind me, when I realized I was nearly pissing on my shoes. But that wasn't so bad, considering the shot Punk Rock Jeff had just made me. "It's called a Bend Me Over," he said as he strained what looked like watered-down cough syrup into two plastic cups. "It'll sneak up on you and hammer you into the ground." Maybe I didn't get hammered, but points for the close call.

I made it out of the bathroom and through a couple of packs of young drinkers who seemed like they either didn't have work in the morning or didn't care. On the patio, you could still hear the Geto Boys' old-school ode to paranoia, "Mind Playing Tricks on Me," coming from the traditional (non-Internet) jukebox. I sat with a reporter friend who was dragging on a menthol and talking about covering a recent homicide, just one of the nearly 100 that Houston has already notched this year. So next time you feel like getting inspirational on a bathroom wall, cut the yearbook crap and try something simpler. "Remember that things could always be worse. Also, don't piss on your shoes."

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Keep the Houston Press Free... Since we started the Houston Press, it has been defined as the free, independent voice of Houston, and we would like to keep it that way. Offering our readers free access to incisive coverage of local news, food and culture. Producing stories on everything from political scandals to the hottest new bands, with gutsy reporting, stylish writing, and staffers who've won everything from the Society of Professional Journalists' Sigma Delta Chi feature-writing award to the Casey Medal for Meritorious Journalism. But with local journalism's existence under siege and advertising revenue setbacks having a larger impact, it is important now more than ever for us to rally support behind funding our local journalism. You can help by participating in our "I Support" membership program, allowing us to keep covering Houston with no paywalls.

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