It is officially HOT in Houston. You wanna know how I know this (aside from the fact that I have to briefly walk from my apartment to my car to my office in the morning, and then again from my office to my car to my apartment in the evening)? The air conditioning in my car is out. Driving anywhere has become an exercise in seeing how close I can get to my eventual destination before I become drenched in sweat. It's super fun.

It's times like these that make me crave one thing, and one thing only: Frozen booze. Ice to cool me down and booze to make me forget how pissed I am about the whole air conditioner thing. I suppose I could make my own in the comfort of my cool apartment, but where's the fun in that?

Besides, there's no way I'm going to garnish my own drinks as nicely as these folks do.

5. El Pueblito Patio - Cocorita Put the lime in the coconut and drink it all up. I think someone really wise once said that, and El Pueblito took heed, because that's exactly what they do at the swanky Latin/Caribbean restaurant. The Cocorita is exactly what it sounds like--a margarita made with coconut water then served inside a coconut for maximum gaudiness. Hey, sometimes you just want to drink out of a piece of fruit.

4. Voodoo Queen - Penus Coladus If you can get past the name and the slow, surly service, you'll find the Penus Coladus to be quite tasty. It's rich and smooth thanks to a generous serving of coconut cream blended with pineapple juice, Bacardi 151, light rum and Fireball whiskey. It's sweet but not cloying, and it packs quite the punch. Just because it doesn't taste strong...

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3. Lei Low - Shipwrecked on Tiki Island Where better to indulge in frozen tiki drinks than Houston's favorite new tiki bar? The patio isn't yet ready, but when it is, it'll be the perfect place to get shipwrecked (or just wrecked) on your own tiki island. This frozen drink featured black rum and coconut rum along with banana, guava and special tiki bitters. Much like the drinks at Voodoo Queen, a few of these will knock you on your ass.

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2. The Pastry War - Frozen Margarita I have never been a fan of frozen margaritas, because they're usually too sweet and not strong enough. The Pastry War has made me a convert. The frozen margaritas at the downtown "mezcaleria" are simple and standard--unless you order one of the wild flavors like ginger and mole or a green chartreuse floater. Whatever you choose, though, you can be sure the lime juice will be fresh and devoid of that nasty chemical taste, the Tapatio tequila will be strong, and the temperature will be just right.

1. D&T Drive Inn - Frozen Shandy So yes, a shandy is the weakest of the drinks on this list, alcohol-wise, but that just means you can drink more of them! D&T Drive Inn took the popular beer and lemonade combo to the next level by freezing it and dishing it out in mason jars garnished with lemon wedges. I can't think of anything more refreshing on a hot summer evening. Unless, of course, you're more of a wine-drinker, in which case, D&T's frozen sangria will rock your world.