This Week in Deliciousness: That Candy Inspector Van Is Totes Legit

Welcome back to the weekly roundup here at Eating...Our Words, where we've spent the better part of the week trying to think up food-themed voodoo hexes. So far the best we've got is "May it rain torrentially when you are unloading your collection of miniature rock-candy Tiffany lamps." It's pretty specific, but reasonably strong.

We started the week off right with a list of the top five foods we're looking forward to eating the most during this brief time of slightly-less-blistering heat which we optimistically, perhaps delusionally, refer to as "fall."

We covered three simple rules for proper use of truffle oil, accidentally leaving off the fourth and most important rule: Never leave your old truffle oil rags laying around near a heat source. (Truffle oil is something you put into tiny European cars, right?)

We also listed five chain food trucks we wish existed, and if we may humbly suggest a sixth: Pancho's Sopapilla Trucks. Yeah, that's right. Genius, no? And the best part: All you have to do is raise the little flag on your car antenna and it comes right to you. SHUT UP, PRETEND THAT CARS STILL HAVE ANTENNAS FOR THIS JOKE.

Comida con vino is Spanish for "fancy multi-course meal of tasty Tex-Mex with wine pairings," and we support that concept a thousand percent. We also support a multi-course meal paired with classical music selections, though we'd like to see this done with other genres of food and music. Barbecue and bluegrass. Soul food and Motown. Extra-spicy Thai food and death metal. "Tiger Cry" is both the featured dish and the band name on that one.

A kickass vegetarian meal is always something to be admired, though perhaps not as much as three-dollar wine in bulk. Shave even more off the price and put it in a box, Trader Joe, it's cool! We're not proud.

Because yes, it is technically autumn, we listed five retro Halloween treats we miss, from back in the day before helicopter parents threw away anything that wasn't vacuum-sealed and notarized by the local candy inspector. You guys have a candy inspector in your neighborhood, right? Or is...is that just something he tells people? Uh-oh.

Finally: Check out our Best of Houston® edition!

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John Seaborn Gray