| Lists |

Top 5 Booze Ads From The 80s

Keep Houston Press Free
I Support
  • Local
  • Community
  • Journalism
  • logo

Support the independent voice of Houston and help keep the future of Houston Press free.

Earlier this week we looked at some of the most memorable fast food commercials from the 1980s. Now it's time to charge your flux capacitors for a trip back to see some of the best and most sexually perverse booze ads the 80's had to offer.

5. Bud Light: Spuds Mackenzie

Who are the ad wizards that came up with this one? They called him, "The Original Party Animal", I call him a dog that successfully seduces human bitches. Either way, it was a hit and Bud's stranglehold on the US beer market continued. Bestiality rules!

4. Bartles & Jaymes: The two old dudes

The two first two words that come to mind when I hear wine cooler are "heart & burn". The second two words would be Bartles & Jaymes. Back in the 80's there was a folksy, chubby guy and a slim, silent fella that went on crazy adventures to introduce you to flavors like Black Cherry.

3. Seagram's Wine Cooler: Bruce Willis

Just before Bruce Willis became a megastar with a gem called Hudson Hawk he was a die hard pitchman for Seagram's. Maybe he had a sixth sense about the growing beverage market or maybe he simply wanted to moonlight as a dancing harmonica player in sin city. Still, after five years the campaign seemed unbreakable and destined for pulp fiction. I can say though that it would have to be Armageddon before I would buy one of those things.

Colt .45: Billy Dee Williams

Put simply, when Lando Calrissian tells you to do something, you do it. That includes being an extra sexy lady and hopping into the satin-clad sack. It also includes drinking Colt .45.

1. SNL When It Was Still Relevant

OK, I have to admit, this isn't from the 80's and it isn't a real commercial but it is possibly the best spoof of a Reagan-era beer ad ever. Just wait 'til ya see the pool.

Keep the Houston Press Free... Since we started the Houston Press, it has been defined as the free, independent voice of Houston, and we would like to keep it that way. Offering our readers free access to incisive coverage of local news, food and culture. Producing stories on everything from political scandals to the hottest new bands, with gutsy reporting, stylish writing, and staffers who've won everything from the Society of Professional Journalists' Sigma Delta Chi feature-writing award to the Casey Medal for Meritorious Journalism. But with local journalism's existence under siege and advertising revenue setbacks having a larger impact, it is important now more than ever for us to rally support behind funding our local journalism. You can help by participating in our "I Support" membership program, allowing us to keep covering Houston with no paywalls.

We use cookies to collect and analyze information on site performance and usage, and to enhance and customize content and advertisements. By clicking 'X' or continuing to use the site, you agree to allow cookies to be placed. To find out more, visit our cookies policy and our privacy policy.


Join the Press community and help support independent local journalism in Houston.


Join the Press community and help support independent local journalism in Houston.