Ask Willie D 11/24/2016

Dear Willie D:

I’m a former widow going through a little drama with my husband at the moment because he called me an unfit mother. We dated for six weeks, and got married because we fell in love quickly. He is very critical of my parenting skills because I have a son in jail and both of my daughters have children with men they aren’t married to.

My oldest daughter recently moved out, but she and my youngest daughter visit us daily. My husband never says anything to my kids, but as soon as they leave our house, he starts complaining about how terrible each of them, and their kids, are. I’m starting to think I made a big mistake in marrying him, but my faith requires me to stick it out.

What should I do?

Former Widow:

I think you made a big mistake too, but faith without work is dead. Meaning that, if you have faith but don’t work on demanding that your man stop bad-mouthing your children and talking down on you, your faith won’t save you.

WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT AMERICAN POLITICS

So, I hate Trump, but I was never for Hillary because I feel she stands as a puppet for the rich and elite: Rothschilds, Rockefellers, etc. I totally understand your need for [equality] and civil rights, and I think in 2016 there are a lot of white folks who would stand with you on that.

Though I think the Dems and Hillary are a facade, it makes you feel like they’re gonna do something to help push forward the movement. But I don’t think they really give a crap. It’s a shame the only thing I like about Republicans is they stand strong on the Second Amendment, and I think they make our country look stronger in the eyes of other nations.

Otherwise, I’m a registered Dem. What do you think about all this madness?

Registered Dem:

It’s a sad day in America when Americans vote against a particular candidate, rather than voting for the candidate of their choice. As such, Donald Trump’s election will only serve to shape up the Democratic Party to run a better candidate in 2020. However, I don’t know if that’s possible. I hope I’m wrong, but our political system seems to be beyond repair.

I’m no fan of Hillary either, but even if Trump does everything he said he would do during the campaign, and he turns out to be the greatest president ever, it won’t matter because I’m going to give him the same disrespectful, iniquitous treatment he gave Obama. Even if he brings Michael Jackson back for one last Jackson 5 Reunion Tour, I’m going to ride on him every chance I get. That’s right, ain’t no fun when the rabbit got the gun!

AM I STUPID FOR WAITING ON A NONCOMMITTAL MAN TO COMMIT?

Dear Willie D:

I’m between jobs at the moment, so I’ve been spending a lot of time with my guy lately. He makes himself available for me, but he isn’t interested in marriage, or even in being committed as a boyfriend.

He told me the first day I met him that he wasn’t interested in commitment because he is focused on his career. At the time that was okay with me because I had grown used to my freedom after several rocky relationships, but after one year of single life, and doing all the things couples do, I’m starting to feel him.

We haven’t verbalized it, but the expectation is that neither of us will date anyone else but we are free to do so if we choose. I want to take our relationship to the next level, but I don’t want to be the first to say so. Should I continue to wait on him to make the first move, go for it, or is a relationship with my non-committal man a lost cause?

Rocky Relationships:

I really want to tell you to hang in there a little longer, he’ll come around, but I’m not a fan of lost causes. The truth is, he won’t commit. If he does, please send me a follow-up letter along with the voodoo doll you used. With all of the people out there trying to escape the friend zone, I could make a fortune.

I’M 15. HOW DO I TELL MY DAD ABOUT MY BOYFRIEND?

Dear Willie D:

I have a boyfriend and we’re the same age, but I don’t know how to tell my mom and dad about him. They told me I could start dating when I turn 16, which is in another three months. How do I tell them about him?

Turning 16:

Even though you disobeyed your parents by dating, you deserve credit for wanting to be honest and tell them about your boyfriend instead of hiding it. Here’s what you do. Set it up for your boyfriend to be at a school or a church function [somewhere he’ll look trustworthy] when you know your parents will be there, and tell him to walk over to introduce himself.

After he leaves, turn to your parents and say: Hey guys, I know you told me I couldn’t date until I was 16, but [insert his name] and I are kind of seeing each other. I wasn’t looking for a boyfriend when I met him; it sort of just happened. He’s a great guy and I really like him, and I know you will too once you get to know him. So, I’m asking for your permission to continue dating him.

If that doesn’t work, run off and marry him. Okay, just playing. They’ll come around.

Ask Willie D anything at willied.com/ask-willie-d, and come back next Thursday for more of his best answers.