Title: M3GAN 2.0
Describe This Movie Using One “Robots” Lyric:
Finally, robotic beings rule the world
The humans are dead
We used poisonous gases
And we poisoned their asses
Brief Plot Synopsis: Somertimes th3y come back.
Rating Using Random Objects Relevant To The Film: 3.5 B.A. Baracuses out of 5.
Tagline: “I’m still that B.”
Better Tagline: “Your plastic pal who’s not so fun to be with.”
Not So Brief Plot Synopsis: Two years after the Model 3 Generative Android (Amie Donald/Jenna Davis) tried to protect her niece Cady (Violet McGraw) with what could charitably described as extreme prejudice, roboticist Gemma (Allison Williams) has embarked on a campaign in support of ethical robotics, aided by Christian (Aristotle Athari), a former IT security expert, and co-workers Tess (Jen Van Epps) and Cole (Brian Jordan Alvarez). Trouble is, the M3GAN technology has been stolen and used to create a new killbot (Ivanna Sakhno) that only the original might be capable of stopping.
“Critical” Analysis: “Artificial intelligence,” which is the name erroneously given to glorified content aggregators and Large Language Models, is everywhere. Your search engines offer “AI enhanced” results that may or may not be accurate. Teachers bitch about kids using ChatGPT to write papers, then turn around and use it to grade students’ work.
It’s also spreading like black mold through the creative world. AI novels are already being “written,” while legitimate artists are losing gigs because companies would rather throw stock imagery out there with the wrong number of fingers than pay someone for their work.
What does this have to do with M3GAN 2.0? Like Mission: Impossible – The Final Reckoning, the Big Bad this time around is an A.I. (the Motherboard) that, should AMELIA (Autonomous Military Engagement Logistics and Infiltration Android … you gotta respect the hustle in coming up with these acronyms) gain access to it, could — all together now — Take Over The World.
If this level of artificial intelligence was actually achievable we’d already be screwed, but M3GAN 2.0‘s grasp of tech development would be laughable if we actually cared about any of that. The movie can’t help over-explaining the various precautions in place to keep the Motherboard at bay and then completely ignoring them to get to the wow finish.
It shouldn’t be lost on audiences that – implausible as the scenarios presented are – Hollywood is one of the few industries occasionally presenting artificial intelligence (or the glorified content aggregators currently going by that title) as a threat. As I said above, Christopher McQuarrie tried to warn us for two movies.
AMELIA is more or less the T-1000 Terminator to M3GAN’s T-800. Director Gerald Johnstone extends the metaphor by allowing M3GAN to become … not appreciative of human life, but far flexible in her parameters for mercy. Yeah, that’s it. M3GAN 2.0 also features the best use of a Kate Bush song since Stranger Things. Seriously, I was howling.
The movie also gives Williams and McGraw more to do, which is good to see. Jemaine Clement is also efficiently unctuous as an Elon-adjacent tech billionaire dipshit no one will miss. Though I’m not sure how a line like, “The future is cloud computing” made it to the finished product, unless the script was written in 2006.
Christian’s also wrong in asserting that the military are the earliest adopters of new technology, unless the M3GAN-verse is one where pornography doesn’t exist.
Johnstone and co-creator Akela Cooper bring strong T2 and A-Team vibes, a vicious and pinpoint sense of humor, and a story that feels like a legitimate evolution from the original. M3GAN 2.0 is nasty, nonsensical fun. At least they finally explained how Gemma was getting that huge apartment in the Mission District for $3K a month.
M3GHAN 2.0 is in theaters today.
