Junk Bond
TUE 1/4 They say a rich man’s trash is a poor man’s treasure. Leonardo Drew has spun this proverb on its head: His assemblages of trash, rust and found objects are coveted by the likes of the Guggenheim in Bilbao, the Metropolitan Museum of Art and, yes, wealthy collectors around…
Letters
“Gold” Line Stands First-class coach: I want to commend Michael Serazio on his wonderful article about the discrepancies in high school football in this great state [“What Price Glory?” December 16]. We are accustomed to seeing the fancy headsets on Friday night and glistening practice fields across the state, but…
Triple H-town
THU 12/30 With all due respect to the current regime of ‘roided-out wrestlers, we have to say: Whatever happened to the good ol’ days? Gone is the heyday of the balding, orange-skinned power-flexer Hulk Hogan, who conquered worldwide evil — like the ambiguously Middle Eastern villain Iron Sheik — in…
Buggin’ Out
It begins in the stillness of night, as these things often do. The sharp-eyed hunter, squinting and squatting in the shadows of his porch, stuffs the bait into his traps and thinks about the first time he ran this mission. He had been sitting on a slab of sidewalk just…
High Rollers
FRI 12/31 They had us at “stilts.” Yes, at the massive Forbidden City New Year’s Eve party, sexy “stilt twins” will high-step their way through the crowd. Aerial silk dancers will weave overhead, FLY Dance Company will deliver hip-hop moves, pyrotechnic dancers will spin flames, and Las Vegas-style showgirls will…
Fish Bowl
Somehow “fish stew” ($10.99) doesn’t sound half as appetizing as peixada à brasileira, its Portuguese translation, found on the menu of Emporio Brazilian Cafe (12288 Westheimer, 281-293-7442). But no matter what you call it, it’s a heartwarming meal that comes with enough seafood — shrimp, calamari and pieces of salmon…
Flat Fee
Its not a bad deal: In Promises, Promises, young corporate drone and nice guy Chuck Baxter (Joel Sandel) agrees to lend his pad to company executives for extramarital trysts. In exchange, hes promised a raise, a promotion and, hopefully, free laundry service. But things get messy when Chuck starts to…
Le Grand Cheesecake
The soaring facade of Grand Lux Cafe looks like the outside of one of those pseudo-Italian Las Vegas casinos. As you drive down Westheimer, an enormous painting inside plays peek-a-boo through three giant round windows mounted several stories above the parking lot. “The first time I saw that place, I…
New Angels in Rock Heaven
Music or connoisseurs of rock death, most of 2004 was a pretty bum vintage. That’s not to say that nobody notable died — after all, this was the year we lost Ray Charles. But for aesthetes of the grand rock demise, 2004 lacked the ludicrously romantic death of a wounded…
I’ll Drink to That
This party is out of control. The keg is tapped, the air is gray, and cigarette butts float like rotten cherries in half the drinks on the counter. And everyone’s paired off, either contemplating bathroom assignations or arguing over when The Golden Girls jumped the shark. You need to get…
Owed to Billy Joe
Did you know that Texas has a poet laureate? I didn’t until last week, when I was browsing the Net and came across an editorial in the Sacramento Bee that explored the issue of Arnold Schwarzenegger’s selection of California’s next state poet. The article pointed out that most people don’t…
Sunday Morning Coming Down
You’ve been there before: sitting silently with your thoughts while something (perhaps a demon) takes control of your arm and hoists another drink to your already liquor-lubed lips. You’re in a pleasant place — a nicely buzzed state of mind — but you can’t seem to let it be and…
Playbill
New Birth Brass Band Thirty years ago, the New Orleans brass band tradition had all but died out. Luckily enough for the whole world, the Dirty Dozen Brass Band came along, funked things up and helped save the style. Ten years later, the Rebirth Brass Band then mere teenagers came…
Splish Splash Thud
The early reviews for Beyond the Sea, the Bobby Darin biopic on which Kevin Spacey did everything save for feeding the crew and sweeping the set, have been so hateful that a latecomer to the bashing bash is tempted to head straight for the spiked egg nog and let the…
Den of Iniquity
A bit of advice when considering whether to see Bear Cub, a lovely new drama from Spanish director Miguel Albaladejo: Ignore the title. Also, if you would, please bypass the cringe-worthy pun of the tagline, “Parenthood is about to get a little hairier.” Because quite apart from those cutesy and…
Fertle Family Values
Here’s a holiday recipe from the ersatz kitchen of Mildred Fertle, the happy, scrappy doyenne of the Singing Fertles from Dumpster, Texas. It’s a Fertle favorite, a stunner of a dessert to die for: butter pie. The recipe’s not copyrighted, but it should be, so I’m at liberty to print…
Capsule Reviews
Jesus Christ Superstar When Tim Rice and Andrew Lloyd Webber’s Jesus Christ Superstar opened on Broadway in the early ’70s, the rock opera caused quite a controversy. Many traditional Christians thought the show was sacrilegious. It does, after all, have lots of lines like “I don’t know how to love…
Packrat Pack
After years of gift exchanges, you’ve mastered the face, that look of “Wow, thanks, I’ve always wanted one of these.” But just what was your friend thinking when she showed up — happy as can be — and handed you that lame-ass gift? Does she know you at all? You…
Capsule Reviews
“Arielle Masson” and “Gloria Kisch” Arielle Masson’s paintings at New Gallery have a decidedly astral bent to them; their imagery references galaxies, satellites and otherworldly architecture. Masson works large-scale with acrylic and ink on ten-foot-long scroll-like rolls of paper, and the works that are the most organic fare the best…
This Week’s Day-by-Day Picks
Thursday, December 30 Okay Bob Schneider, we get it. Life is harsh. You get depressed; you get addicted. Shut up already! You got to date Sandra Bullock. By rights, every tune you write should be annoyingly catchy, poppy and happy. But no, you left the Ugly Americans and now you’re…
Books and Bullets
In these post-Columbine days of zero tolerance in schools, when kids are expelled for bringing water pistols to class, it’s nice to see someone who refuses to buckle under to the PC police. If you’re the owner of a gun shop and your longtime store has burned to the ground,…
Kidding Around
Sure, they were all professional comedians. But somewhere during last season’s Last Comic Standing, nearly every single cast member of NBC’s hit show became a lame reality-show caricature of himself. In the end, only three savvy pros survived. And of them, John Heffron would win it all. The 34-year-old –…
On Shaky Grounds
The children running around in the schoolyard pay no mind to the solitary iron post in the large vacant lot nearby. They are more concerned with basketballs, jump ropes and each other. The post doesnt look like much, but for Claudetta Dyer its a totem of memory. Dyers old house…