Don’t know what to do with all those unused Best Buy and Circuit City gift cards left over from the holidays? Why not pick up Nickelback’s new Ultimate Video Collection DVD, in stores today? Not only will you get 12 videos of some sort of mentally challenged Jesus impersonator belting out lyrics about being a rock star ripping off your pants, smashing the DVD creates shards upon shards of jagged hard plastic, just the ticket for cutting those hard-to-reach veins. Remember, when it comes to wrists, go down the street, not across the street. Just a tip.
Here’s This Mortal Coil’s “Kangaroo.” If I’m going out, it won’t be to the strains of “Rockstar.”
Oh yeah, this is gross… – Craig Hlavaty
This article appears in Jan 24-30, 2008.
