9:55 p.m.: Mac Miller concert. Let's just get them all out of the way now: Asher Roth, Eminem, Yelawolf, Machine Gun Kelly, Paul Wall, Rich Hill, Aesop Rock, Bubba Sparxxx, El-P, MC Serch, R.A. the Rugged Man...
He's white, get it? It's cool to be like, "Race doesn't matter to me," blah, blah, blah. And it might not matter here, but it's always going to matter and blah, blah, blah. Blah, blah, blah, get it? Blah, blah, blah.
10:01: Outside waiting, trying to get clearance for our photographer to bring his camera in. Apparently, the facists that arranged the tour aren't allowing outside photographers in. Pretty sucky, really. However, to ease the sting, God has made it so that while we wait, we get to watch a police officer get in some tiny white girl's shit about something (fake ID, probably). There are a lot of things aren't supposed to be funny that are; Watching A Teenaged Girl Try Not To Cry In Front Of A Bunch Of Strangers is definitely on the list.
10:07: No go on the camera. Beautiful.
10:08: Walking in. Place is full, but not as full as we were expecting. Still, good turnout. The crowd largely looks like just like Mac. That probab--wait. Aw crap.
You know what's heartbreaking? Suddenly realizing you are not part of a target demographic. Shit. Ah, that's sad. Double dang. They might say the whole, "No, no, hip-hop is for EVERYONE" thing, but really, everyone knows that Mac Miller and his team weren't sitting around in a meeting like, "So, how can we better reach the 30-Year-Old Mexican Men With Families cohort more effectively?"
This is a little embarrassing. It's like, sure, we're here to write about the show, but these kids, these teenaged bastards with their flexible bodies and rapid fire metabolism, they don't know that. At best, we're someone's parent. At worst, a potential pedophile.
Man, fu--oh, hey, Mac just came out. Cool.
10:47: These kids are goddamn jazzed right now. This place might burn to the ground. Very excellent.
10:50: "Who's been listening to be since the Jukebox days? Man, that was back, like, in 2009." -Mac Miller // Back, like, in 2009? That's two years ago. Two. And he just said it like it was fifteen. The shoes we have on, we bought them in 2005. Damn it. Feeling really unhip right now.
10:51: Oh snap. Trae just popped out. That's a serious ass juxtaposition right there. It's like watching a Rottweiler play with a Maltese.
10:51:05: (In case you missed that, the colors even matched up in that analogy. You're welcome.)
10:54: Haha. Trae's performing "Swang." Most times, when someone does a surprise guest song, they'll do one verse and then wander off. Trae is doing the entire song. Even after the music is cut off, he keeps going. What can you say to him though? Who's going to tell the terrifying bulldozer with the microphone that time's up? Nobody, that's who.
10:57: Man, Miller has this crowd frothing. He'll stop, talk to them for a bit, charm them, charm them, let it just sort of sit there in the air, then watch as the beat from whatever next song he's about to perform comes on and the crowd loses its shit. It's exciting every time.
10:58: He's talking about how one of the criticisms of his music is that he only ever talks about weed, alcohol and girls. He says, "I talk about some other things," but doesn't press. Then he explains, "But I guess that's because I smoke a lot of weed, drink a lot of alcohol and fuck a lot of girls." Harharhar. Is there anything more unsettling to think about than Mac Miller having sex with someone?
11:01: "Oh, hey, a black guy," said every person at this show when this black guy just walked by.
11:04: He's doing that song about having Nikes on his feet. The crowd hasn't died down once. Neat. Did you know that Mac Miller is the first guy in, like, 100 years or something to have his album, an independent album, land number one in the country? That's pretty impressive. Something about being the embodiment of hip-hop's DIY ethos. Something about hard work.
11:07: "If you sing along to this song, you'll have a 30 percent greater chance of getting laid." [laughter] Mac Miller is king of these kids. It's like he's everyone's best friend. You can argue that he isn't the greatest rapper alive, but you cannot argue that he isn't built perfectly for the role he plays right now. Something to be said for that.
11:10: That song with the video where they dress up like it's the 50s, that shit is super hype in concert. Best moment of the night.
11:23: ...and now he's playing the guitar. He touches on Weezer and Oasis, among other things. Then he gets up and plays a blues rift behind his head. Cool.
11:23:15: FYI, playing a guitar behind your head, while less than groundbreaking, is just about always impressive. More people should do more shit behind their heads. Try this: Next time you're out on date, be like, "Oh, excuse me one second, I need to make this really important call," then look your date right in the eyes, take out your phone, place it behind your head, then dial a number. Fuck me if that's not the illest date move of all-time.
11:45: Miller is coasting right now. It's kind of hard not to like him. He seems very genuine.
11:47: "Party on 5th Street," which samples "The 900 Number." New best moment of the night. These kids are going bonkers. This is a very good show. Ignore the pretense and ignore the academics and ignore the everything else. Turn your brain off. Mac is tough. Dang.
11:51: Jackson Five is playing. This shit just keeps going.
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Personal Bias: If you listen to it in spurts, Blue Slide Park is good even if you're not an affluent teenager.
The Crowd: Seriously?
Overheard in the Crowd: Probably something about not finishing Mrs. Park's algebra homework or whatever. Who knows. It's like they're speaking a different language.
Random Notebook Dump: Of course the omnipotent Bun showed up. Heretofore, he shall only ever be referred to as The Legend.