Part of the fun of being a football fan is we get to start a new season with a clean slate. Your favorite team does its best during the off-season to make the necessary improvements to fulfill its destiny to Super Bowl glory. While the first game of the new Houston Texans campaign resulted in a heartbreaking 36-31 loss to those rat bastard Buffalo Bills, the season is long and full of promise for Ws against rat bastards to come on the season schedule.
While new additions like Kayshon Boutte and running back David Montgomery (the first Texan to score three TDs in their team debut) are pivotal to the team’s chances, there are other things that could help the Texans go from playoff early exits to Lombardi Award holders. Little things only certain fans might appreciate, like the music commonly heard during Texans game days.
Both on the parking lot’s tailgate parties and in the stadium between downs, we think the clean slate of a new year offers a chance for new songs we’d like to hear more of and the welcomed removal of others. We asked some folks on the Blue Lot at last weekend’s Texans tailgate for their thoughts on the matter.
Melissa Abercia and Noah Simmons: Mom & Son Music Fans
Abercia and Simmons are mother and son and have a pretty deep knowledge of recorded music. They’re big fans of the local NFL team and enjoy a broad swath of music genres. We posed the question: which songs do you not want to hear at Texans games this season, and what would you like to hear instead? They responded in that cool back-and-forth way only a mother and child can.
“No more AC/DC at all,” Noah said.
“I love AC/DC, but we’re done,” Melissa agreed.
“More Kendrick,” Noah suggested, to which Mom said “I would agree with that. “
“More country music. It is Texas,” he added.
“That is true,” she agreed.
“They need to play more Selena in the stadium,” Noah offered, which lit up Mom’s face with delight. “I don’t think I’ve ever heard her once in the stadium.”
“She needs to be honored,” Melissa said emphatically. Then they both told how much they enjoy the Houston Texans Mariachi band, which plays mariachi classics like “El Rey” and “Volver Volver” during football timeouts in the stadium.
“No more ‘Deep in the Heart of Texas,’” Noah laughed. (Note: much to this nice young man’s horror, “Deep in the Heart of Texas” was actually played in the stadium during a television timeout of the Bills game, a rather long version of it, too. To Noah’s point, Texans fans lost interest and stopped singing and clap-, clap-, clap-, clapping near the end of the overplayed song).
“George Strait more. There’s not enough George Strait,” Noah said and, as might be expected, Melissa agreed.
But, mother and son didn’t agree on every possible addition or exclusion. Melissa said “No, never” to the Texans’ use of Clay Walker’s “Football Time in Houston.” It was (is?) considered the team’s official fight song. But Noah, a lifelong Texans fan, advocated for it.
“It’s just because I grew up with it, that’s why,” Noah said.
The family has been Houston Texans season ticket holders since day one. We asked if they remembered the music played in the stadium that first game, a 19-10 victory over the dreaded Dallas Cowboys. Noah didn’t recall. In his defense, he wouldn’t be born until season three. But Melissa remembered.
“I think it was AC/DC back then, honestly!” she said.
Cathy Cantu: Music that Provides Watt-age
Longtime Texans fan Cathy Cantu said Rage Against the Machine’s “Bulls on Parade” is a “for sure, has to stay, classic.”
“That’s the classic defense, that was our best defensive line kind of song. It’s a staple,” Cantu said forcefully while sporting a crisp, white, vintage JJ Watt jersey, as if to make her point.
“I’m still a Watt fan, forever and ever,” she said of the legendary Houston Texan who was handling lead analyst duties for CBS on Sunday. She said his leadership on the field and his work benefiting Houston communities, particularly after Hurricane Harvey, make him a beloved Texans legend.
“And yeah, he’s a little cute,” she added. That prompted her husband Kiko to walk a plate of smoked chicken and beef kabobs to her and see if she needed her drink refreshed. He said the team needs to adopt something especially menacing and suggested “Bodies,” not the original Drowning Pool song but the Offset and JID version which extrapolates from the 2001 hard rock track. Drowning Pool hits Warehouse Live Midtown on October 9 for anyone interested.
The Cantus entered their 17th year as season ticket holders Sunday with very high hopes, hopes that the Texans offense will improve and the D might challenge Watt’s glory day defense. They aren’t sure what will happen but they do know one thing.
“I never want to hear Clay Walker again,” Kiko said. “Nobody cares about ‘Football Time in Houston.’
DJ Gemini: Bring the Tejano
Giovanni Soriano, also known as DJ Gemini, told us the Puro Tailgating squad has been on the lot celebrating Texans game days for three years now. His friend, DJ Lil Koolaid (great name!), brought him on this year to help keep the party going. Judging by the mass of people laughing, eating and dancing, DJ Gemini is off to a good start.
“That’s a good question. Songs that I wanna hear a lot more of? It’s gotta be Tejano music, man,” said Soriano, who has been deejaying for 20 years now and knows the good stuff. “Any Tejano music. That’s the culture of this city. This city’s really diverse, that’s what I love about deejaying and playing all types and kinds of music.
“A song I don’t wanna hear anymore is the Houston football,…”
“Clay Walker?” we intervened.
“Yeah, yeah!” DJ Gemini said. “I’m tired of that song. I love Clay Walker, he’s got some great songs. That one, it just doesn’t do it for me.”
Asked for someone to step into Walker’s boots, DJ Gemini didn’t hesitate.
“Any Emilio Navaira,” he said of the late, great Tejano legend. “‘Cómo Le Haré’, Hometown Boys. You can’t go wrong with those, man.”
Zach Cooper Sets Off a Firestorm
Zach Cooper was on the lot with friends, just trying to enjoy a relaxing Sunday morning, when we bombarded him with our intrusive music/football question. It took him a second to think of the song he never wants to hear again at any sporting event, whether it’s the Houston Texans, the Savannah Bananas, Borussia Mönchengladbach (Bundesliga, baby!) or any other team lining up for play.
“I think it’s kinda lame when they play ‘Sweet Caroline’ all the time,” he said of the Neil Diamond classic.
“That song’s about a girl who was 14 when he wrote about her,” his friend added. Because of the firestorm he was about to set off, he asked not to be named in the article.
“That’s weird,” Cooper said. “Now I like it even less.”
Conversation about age-appropriateness erupted at the tailgate so we did a little research to see if Zach’s anonymous friend was correct in his assertions. He wasn’t. Apparently, Diamond once revealed he’d been inspired to write the song by JFK’s daughter, Caroline Kennedy. But, she wasn’t 14 at the time. She was 12. (Later, Diamond said the song was actually written for his wife at the time, and not a pre-teen).
“Michael Jackson never wrote about kids,” Cooper’s pot-stirring friend added. “He wrote about a mouse.”
“What about ‘P.Y.T?’” someone in the group added. “I’m just saying, he doesn’t specify the age of his ‘Pretty Young Thing’ in the song.”
We tried to right the ship by asking Cooper for a song we need to hear at the Texans game or tailgate, something to end the whole encounter on a positive note.
“It’s probably a little overplayed, but I still like ‘Still Tippin’,’’ Cooper said of the all-time, H-town rap banger. “That’s always good at a Texans game. They play it a lot but there’s a reason they do.”
Order was nearly restored, but one tailgater just couldn’t shake the idea of Neil Diamond’s homage to a 12 year-old. Somehow, it had overtaken Walker’s “Football Time in Houston” as the most despised song of the morning.
“Way to ruin it for all of us,” she said.
