Let’s make one thing very clear at the outset fo this post. Of all the various weekly or annual gimmicks that I use to draw your eyeballs to my content, the one I enjoy doing the least is “How to Lose a Game in The Plays,” because it’s mere presence means that the Texans lost a very winnable and relevant football game. (Side bar — I don’t deploy this gimmick for blowout losses or irrelevant football games, which means, in recent Texans history, I’ve done very few of these.)
Sunday’s loss to the Colts at NRG Stadium was not only a winnable, relevant football game, but it’s the rare game over the last few seasons where the Texans were believed to be the favorite by the oddsmakers, so it was a particularly excruciating Sunday afternoon at the ol’ stadium. So I don’t relive this out of enjoyment, but instead so that we may be a little better educated on what exactly constitutes a “game altering play.”
So, with all that said, here are the ten plays I thought were most significant and/or emblematic of the type of afternoon we all endured on Sunday. I’ve provided visual aid where the internet has allowed:
1st & 10 at HOU 18
(10:44 – 1st) Anthony Richardson 18 Yd Rush for TD (COLTS 7, TEXANS 0)
If there were one way (or one play) to forfeit all of the positive vibes from offseason and in the building Sunday morning, this was the way to do it — a QB draw, to end a long drive, in which literally nobody laid a hand on Anthony Richardson. Just embarrassing. That would not be the last time either. Stay tuned.
3rd & 5 at HOU 23
(9:23 – 1st) (Shotgun) C.J. Stroud sacked at HST 14 for -9 yards (S.Ebukam). FUMBLES (S.Ebukam) [S.Ebukam], RECOVERED by IND-K.Paye at HST 15. Fumble Forced by IND-54-D.Odeyingbo.
On the Texans’ first possession they did WORSE than go three and out. They went “two and then fumble the ball to the Colts on third down.” This set up the Colts, already leading 7-0, with a room service type drive where they would eventually be spoon fed this….
1st & 10 at HOU 15
(9:13 – 1st) Anthony Richardson 15 Yd Rush for TD (COLTS 14, TEXANS 0)
ANOTHER Anthony Richardson touchdown run. The only difference with this one is that Richardson actually DID get hit at the very end of the play, and he would suffer a concussion that would knock him out for the rest of the afternoon. Unfortunately, that meant backup Gardner Minshew came in, and he was even more deadly than Richardson, albeit with his arm, as opposed to Richardson’s legs.
2nd & 9 at IND 39
(10:38 – 2nd) (Shotgun) G.Minshew pass deep right to W.Mallory pushed ob at HST 18 for 43 yards
So in came Minshew, and he led two 75 yard touchdown drives. On the first one, the big play was a 43 yard busted coverage where some dude by the last name of Mallory got free for 43 yards. Again, just horrendous fundamentals by DeMeco Ryans’ defense.
3rd & 3 at IND 30
(7:06 – 2nd) (Shotgun) C.J. Stroud pass short right to N.Collins to IND 2 for 28 yards (D.Baker). PENALTY on HST, Illegal Formation, 5 yards, enforced at IND 30 – No Play.
This play came with the Texans trailing 21-7, but still showing signs of life offensively. Driving into field goal range, C.J. Stroud hit Nico Collins a catch and run that took the ball down to the Colts’ two yard line, and it would have set up a likely touchdown to make the score 21-14. Unfortunately, replacement left tackle Josh Jones lined up incorrectly (on an infraction the league actually warned all 32 teams last week it would be enforcing more strictly), which brought the play back, and eventually the Texans had to settle for a field goal to make it 21-10.
All FOUR of those third down conversions in the COLTS Two Minute Drill
21-10 at the half, with the Texans getting the ball to start the second half, would have been survivable. They just needed to get the Colts’ offense off the field at the end of the half. Instead, Minshew engineered a 14 play, 75 yard, in about four minutes to give the Colts a 28-10 lead. Here are the four third down conversions from that drive. Just brutal:
3rd & 4 at IND 31
(3:03 – 2nd) (Shotgun) G.Minshew pass short right to J.Downs to IND 43 for 12 yards
3rd & 3 at 50
(1:54 – 2nd) (Shotgun) G.Minshew pass short right to M.Pittman to HST 42 for 8 yards
3rd & 3 at HOU 35
(1:12 – 2nd) (Shotgun) G.Minshew pass short middle to W.Mallory to HST 29 for 6 yards
3rd & 7 at HOU 15
(0:37 – 2nd) (Shotgun) G.Minshew pass short right to J.Downs to HST 4 for 11 yards
Man, that’s just painful to relive. Okay, onto the final play:
3rd & Goal at IND 2
(14:17 – 4th) (Shotgun) C.J. Stroud pass short left to N.Dell for 2 yards, TOUCHDOWN NULLIFIED by Penalty. PENALTY on HST-J.Jones, Offensive Holding, 10 yards, enforced at IND 2 – No Play.
Trailing 31-10 early in the fourth quarter, the Texans HAD to get a touchdown in order to keep their faint hopes alive. After a sad and depressing Anthony Beck carry on 2nd and goal from the Colts two yard line, C.J. Stroud was able to manufacture a Tank Dell TD grab. Unfortunately, Josh Jones is terrible at football, and he was called for a blatant holding penalty. This pushed the Texans back to the 12 yard line, C.J. Stroud was sacked on the next play, and a field goal made it an infuriating 31-13 score.
Along the rest of the way, the Texans would do some good things, like score another touchdown. They would also do some incredibly stupid things, like burn a timeout when the Colts fooled the Texans into thinking they were going for it on a fourth and short at midfield. The Texans would have a field goal blocked, only to get a second chance because of a penalty (that the Texans themselves committed before the snap), and then go on to miss the subsequent field goal attempt.
In other words, new head coach, new quarterback, but a lot of the same maddening crap that makes Sundays feel like a wasted endeavor so often.
Listen to Sean Pendergast on SportsRadio 610 from 6 a.m. to 10 a.m. weekdays. Also, follow him on Twitter at twitter.com/SeanTPendergast, on Instagram at instagram.com/sean.pendergast, and like him on Facebook at facebook.com/SeanTPendergast.
This article appears in Jan 1 – Dec 31, 2023.
