Some emotionally stunted a-hole (or possibly a-holes) spray-painted a swastika, fangs, teardrop tattoos and the words “blood” and “oil” on the giant busts of George Washington, Abraham Lincoln, Sam Houston and Stephen Austin that overlook I-45 near I-10.

The vandalism is believed to have occurred overnight; a man walking his dog near the “Mount Rush Hour” monument, at 1400 Elder Street, Friday morning saw the damage and, presumably after recovering from a Planet of the Apes-like meltdown, sent a picture to the Houston Chronicle.

Not that vandalizing someone’s artwork is ever acceptable, no matter how gaudy, derivative or ridiculous the art may be, but the bandit behind this defacement wasn’t even clever. What is writing “oil” on Honest Abe even supposed to indicate, other than “Hey, Houston, I’m a giant, anonymous douchebag”?

Way to go, dick. ย Now people with actual jobs have to clean up after you.

Contributor Craig Malisow covers crooks, quacks, animal abusers, elected officials, and other assorted people for the Houston Press.