Todd Graham, or the Tale of the Douchebag

Okay, let me see if I have this straight: the douchebag head of a mid-major college athletic program contacts the douchebag head coach of a rival college football team about quitting that job and coming to coach at his school. The douchebag coach, knowing of his offer from the douchebag Athletic Director, starts discussions with his current employer about a contract extension. Based on these negotiations, the douchebag coach goes to the douchebag AD with his demands, which the douchebag AD meets. The douchebag coach, after saying everything was great at his job, suddenly bolts to join the douchebag AD and trashes the school he's been coaching.

Now we flash forward a year and douchebag coach and douchebag AD and their school venture to the stadium of douchebag coach's former school for a football game. The band of the douchebag coach's former school then mocks this coach in its halftime show, and closes the program by calling the coach a douchebag. The response of the douchebag's school is to file a complaint with the conference since, as douchebag AD says, mocking the coach and calling him a douchebag isn't very sportsmanlike.

I've got to say. This is what I get for driving up to see my Dad last Saturday, and not journeying out to Rice Stadium. Because the Rice Marching Owl Band, which doesn't take anything lying down, and which is known for mocking anything and everything, decided to mock former coach Todd Graham, now the coach of Tulsa, which is the team the Owls were playing on Saturday. And yes, the mean old MOB actually called Graham a douchebag.

Apparently, it's okay for a school to contact a rival school's coach, who is under contract, and lure him away. Apparently, it's okay for the coach to lie to his employers and players. That's all civil and sportsmanlike. But if the band calls out said school and said coach, that's a no-no.

Tulsa Athletic Director, Bubba Cunningham told the Tulsa World that "we need to provide an environment where a student-athlete can participate and fans can enjoy college athletics in a very positive way."

I wonder how all of those Rice student-athletes enjoyed the positive college experience of watching their coach lie to them, then split for a school in the same conference? But I guess they don't count.

This leads me to something else which has been bugging me. I've watched several Conference USA football games this season, and they always run these commercials stressing civil behavior and sportsmanship. And that is all well and good. And I do think that it is possible for fans to get too abusive. But damn it, the fans pay a lot of money to attend games. And many good alumni contribute lots of dollars to their programs. If they don't like what they see, they have the right to boo. Fan, is after all, short for fanatic. And the fan who only says positive things and refuses to express displeasure is probably an idiot who deserves someone like Graham as his coach.

And a point of emphasis: I did not attend Rice University. I went to the University of Houston which has been on the receiving end of many a MOB mocking. I have always taken it for what it was: generally something very funny.

I should think that Bubba should have some inkling of what the MOB can do. This isn't a new thing. There was nearly a riot at Kyle Field one year when the MOB said some unkind things about Reveille.

I also think it's funny that Bubba can do to Rice what he did, then complain about the MOB's actions.

Then again, I don't believe the MOB's ever called anyone from UH a douchebag. -- John Royal

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